[blparent] Question about adopting

[Dena Wainwright]

I really think some of this is finding an advocate in whatever adoption 
agency you are using. I know adopting is different than giving birth to your 
own child, but in the whole process of being pregnant, giving birth, finding 
a pediatrician, and dealing with hospital staff after delivery, I really 
found that the attitudes and open-mindedness of the professionals I was 
working with meant everything.
for instance, the day after I had Elise, my nurse happened to be a lactation 
consultant who had actually had experience teaching blind moms how to 
breastfeed. so, she just walked into my room, and gave the clear impression 
to all of the other staff that I could absolutely breastfeed my baby if I 
wanted to, end of discussion.
also, both nights I stayed in the hospital, I sent Jason home to get a good 
night's sleep. those cots in the hospital are so uncomfortable, and I knew I 
would need him more when I came home than I did with a floor full of nurses 
to help me. not one nurse acted nervous about Jason leaving me alone with 
the baby (we were rooming in). not one person indicated that they didn't 
think I would be able to care for her without him there.
this particular hospital even made sure I always knew who would be working 
with me on any given shift, so I would never have concerns that the people 
in my room weren't authorized to handle my baby.
all of this is to say that it is essential to surround yourself with people 
who think you can do this. even if that means that you need to go through a 
few adoption agencies before you find the right fit, it will be worth it in 
the long run.
another idea I have is, if you know someone with an infant, perhaps you 
could ask those parents if you could "borrow" their baby during your next 
home visit. you could then use that baby to show the representative how you 
can do things and interact with a baby without vision. e.g., changing 
diapers, bottle feeding, taking a temperature, etc.
hope this helps, and I love Deb's idea of finding a network of blind parents 
who live near-by.
Dena
 so
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Barbara Hammel" <poetlori8 at msn.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 06, 2008 11:05 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Question about adopting


> Mostly what you have to do is reassure them by explaining various ways 
> you'll handle situations.  Tell them about how you're capable of getting 
> yourself around town and can get places like the doctor.  Tell them about 
> different ways you'll do things like talking thermometers, (also that 
> anyone can feel if a child is warmer than usual.)  Be real insistent about 
> sight isn't everything when raising a child.  Tell them how it's quite 
> possible that a blind parent is more in tune with what a child is doing 
> when you're not in the room than a sighted person.  We learn the sounds we 
> don't want to hear.
> Barbara
>
>
> --------------------------------------------------
> From: "Shannan Zinck" <shannanzinck at gmail.com>
> Sent: Thursday, November 06, 2008 11:20 AM
> To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
> Subject: [blparent] Question about adopting
>
>> I don't really know if anyone can answer this or not but, we had our 
>> first
>> home visit from adoption services today and unfortunately me being 
>> visually
>> impaired and my husband being blind seems to be the biggest concern they
>> have. I guess my question is does anyone have any idea how we would 
>> convince
>> them that we can handle a child or how to ease their minds on this 
>> subject.
>> I really don't want this to become a big enough issue that we have to 
>> fight
>> for this child. Everything else seems fine but, this one point and some 
>> how
>> I feel like I'm being penalized for being born this way even though there
>> was nothing that could be done about it. Any ideas would be really great.
>> thanks.
>>
>> -- 
>> Shannan Zinck
>> Survival is letting GOD take over!!!
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