[blparent] Help before 7:30 Arizona Time Please

[Pickrell, Rebecca M (IS)]

My vote is that she needs a mom or mom-like figure. Or, she needs a big
sister, an older girl/woman in her life. 
Sounds like you've got a kid that really wants to grow up and you want
to find out why, as well as provide her with some women and girls she
can bond with. 
I'd also want to know if she is engaging in cutting, or if she is just
wanting to try shaving. The two are very different, if it's cutting,
she's in need of psychological help, if it's shaving, most of us girls
have tried it before we really need to. For the boys, there's a great
episode of Leave It To Beaver that goes into this. 
Me, I wouldn't be so quick to punish. Sounds to me like she's got a lot
going on that she isn't comfortable sharing with Daddy. Nothing wrong
with that, so long as she isn't hurting herself, and so long as she has
an appropriate adult or adults to share with. 
I also wouldn't punish for lying, sounds like you two are engaging in
one way transmissions v. discussions, and that method clearly isn't
working in this setup. 
Also, if she likes farms, I'd see if she can volunteer at one outside of
this trip. Time outdoors with animals is wonderful in a variety of ways.
She'll also meet people who can help guide her through her teen years. 
Me, I'd let her go, and work on getting some women in her life. Sounds
to me like she needs that more then punishment.

-----Original Message-----
From: blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:blparent-bounces at nfbnet.org]
On Behalf Of Gabe Vega
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 5:40 AM
To: 'NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List'
Subject: [blparent] Help before 7:30 Arizona Time Please
Sensitivity: Confidential

Background:

 

My daughter has had a great interest is woman supplies even before
needing
them, she is 8.75 years old will be 9 in February. And she has been
firmly
told it isn't time, for razors, shaving, lotions, etc.

 

Even before needing to ware bras I would catch her sneaking them from
school
from other little girls to ware them and be cool I guess. She now wares
a
double a so that isn't an issue anymore so it's this razor thing.

 

A couple of days ago I found a razor cap on the bathroom floor. Being I
don't shave I instantly walked up to her asking her where the razor was
that
I suspected she had and she very much denied even knowing of one's
existences. I left it at that and we went on, although I always thought
she
was just lying and I find it sooner or later, I always do and she always
gets caught.

 

So, tonight looking in the medicine cabinet looking for something for my
ear, I found the razor, it's a disposable razor just like the one
matching
the cap I found on the floor a couple of days ago.

 

My problem:

I always let my daughter know why she is being punished, and then I
asking
her to fully explain to me so I know she understands why she is being
punished.

 

Today she is scheduled to go to a field trip to a farm and she is really
looking forward to it. Should I keep her home for a form of punishment?
The
entire school day is being spent at the farm so if I keep her home she
would
be only missing out on the farm. Or do you recommend any other forms of
punishment.

 

Please do understand we have talked, over and over and over about
wanting to
grow up too fast, it has nothing to do with her not knowing. Its her not
listening, and lying about it when confronted with the evidence.

 

Thanks

 

 

Gabe Vega A+, Net+, ATACP

The Tech of all Techs

(623) 565-9357

 

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