[blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit

[Nikki Fugett-Dobens]

Jo Elizabeth,
I have a daughter that is 16 months, so I'm   probably going to encounter 
this too.  Like you said, people don't even think, but really those comments 
are disrespectful.  I would try to explain to other caregivers how these 
comments will make you look to the child, possibly not being as competent, 
or leading her to think she can take advantage of your lack of vision.  I 
would explain to others taking care of Sarah the rules that you like to 
follow,  as part of her routine.
You could also connect a sound source to her, like bells or some other 
divice that would give you cues on where she is.  I wonder if Independent 
Living Aids or some place like that would have ideas or items that could be 
placed under her clothes, or tied on to her shoes.  I'm a first time mom 
too, so these are just thoughts.  I'm hoping this helps.
    Nikki
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at pcdesk.net>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 19, 2009 3:56 PM
Subject: [blparent] Changing a Troubling Habit


> I've been coming up against a situation that is troubling me a little, and 
> I'm looking for some feedback.  I guess I need to know whether I'm 
> overreacting, and there's nothing to be worried about, or if there is 
> something to be concerned about and what I ought to do.
>
> Sarah is almost 21 months old now, and I stay at home with her.  She holds 
> my hand when we leave the house, and I've also got one of those animal 
> backpack harnesses for her.  But around the house, she's taken to running 
> away from me when it's time for me to change her diaper or put her to bed 
> and she isn't interested in doing those things.  I know that's normal 
> toddler behavior, so I don't take it personally.  But I also know there's 
> no way I can chase her and catch up with her, so I don't want to set that 
> up as a pattern.  I just stay in one place and call her, keeping the mood 
> light, and she usually comes to me soon enough.  No big deal.
>
> The problem is, her dad and some sighted friends have chased her and 
> scooped her up, and a couple of times I've heard them say stuff like, 
> "Well, I can see, so I don't have to wait for you to come to me," or "It's 
> hard to get away from someone who can see you, isn't it?"
>
> My worry is, will this start establishing the idea in Sarah's mind that 
> Mom can't see, so she can't keep up, or she can't do what needs doing?  I 
> don't think anybody has meant to be harmful or thoughtless, but wouldn't 
> it be better to have everybody following the no chasing rule?  If so, is 
> there a practical, realistic way to break the chasing habit in other 
> caregivers, or at least stop the comments?
>
> Thanks for thinking about this with me.
>
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
> Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify 
> the hunters.--African Proverb
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