[blparent] Birthday Parties

[Deborah Kent Stein]

A couple of times I had MacDonald's birthday parties for my daughter, and 
they worked out very well.  They had a party coordinator who led games, so 
the kids were all occupied in a structured way.  I also had a copuple of 
parties at home and hired a neighborhood teen to help.  That worked very 
well, and she stuck around to help with the cleanup too.

Debbie

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Peggy Shald" <pshald at neb.rr.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Sunday, December 12, 2010 7:09 PM
Subject: Re: [blparent] Birthday Parties


>I have had a couple at my house, which turned out pretty good, but then you 
>have all the kids and the mess to clean up.  You also have the games to 
>plan and supplies to buy.  When the parties have been outside of the home, 
>Chucky Cheese, the bowling alleys, etc., sometimes it's just easier for 
>sighted people to handle the gifts, kids, etc.  It is hard to hear, and 
>hard to keep track of all the children running wild.  Just my opinion ... 
>not that blind people can't do everything, lol!!  Sometimes it's just 
>easier for the sighted people to do it all!!
>
>
>
> -----Original Message----- 
> From: Allison
> Sent: Sunday, December 12, 2010 1:54 PM
> To: NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List
> Subject: [blparent] Birthday Parties
>
>
> Hi all,
>
> I'd like to know a little more about how you guys, as blind parents, 
> manage
> birthday parties
> for your kids.  Just
> as a little background, Nathaniel, AKA Bubba, is my 9-year-old stepson.  I
> have been in his life since age 7.  He and his dad are both sighted and 
> I'm
> blind.    Bubba and I have a great relationship and get along well.
>
> Now onto my experience with birthday parties... We let Bubba pick out the
> location for his 9th birthday party last
> month.  He chose the bowling alley.  This sounded okay by me and I didn't
> really give it any thought from a blindness perspective.   So his dad and 
> I
> went ahead with
> planning his party, guests, food, activities, etc.  I thought that I had a
> pretty good idea in my head of how the afternoon would go.  I felt fairly
> confident about it.  When we got there on the day of the party, I realized
> that I didn't account for one big thing.  A kid-filled bowling alley on a
> Saturday afternoon is incredibly loud!I don't do a lot of bowling so I 
> don't
> have a great grasp of what's a common sound level for one, but I don't 
> think
> they're always as bad as this one was.  On top of that, I wasn't that well
> oriented to the alley.  I had only been there once or twice before that 
> day.
> So basically, I had an incredibly hard time participating in the party. 
> It
> was awful.  Normally, I use my ears to help orient myself, but I couldn't
> really do
> that in the alley because there was loud music, pins, and conversation.  I
> could hardly pick my own kids voice out of the crowd, let alone keep track
> of 7 of his friends.  I tried to help with little things like getting 
> balls
> for the kids, passing plates,  or sorting gifts, but I was fairly
> unsuccessful because I had no idea where anything was.  Thankfully
> Bubba's dad and grandparents helped run the party and everything went
> well, but I felt so frustrated because I didn't really contribute anything
> useful to the event.  I just hung out with other adult family members and
> friends, and talked to the kids... when I could find them.  My boyfriend,
> Bubba's dad, tried to include me in party activities when he could, but
> he was rushed and frantic trying to keep things running smoothly for the
> kids.  I think he was feeling totally overwhelmed himself.  I made sure to
> give Bubba a ton of attention when I could, so I don't think he felt
> that I wasn't participating, but I feel like I wasn't.  I felt more like 
> an
> extra body.
>
> Okay.  So I learned a little something about pre-planning when it comes to
> birthday parties.  I learned the hard way that I have to, at the very 
> least,
> try to orient myself to a party location ahead of time.  But I still 
> wonder,
> how/what do we do with our kids in loud chaotic places crowded with child
> activity?  I wonder this because, last weekend we took Nathaniel to a
> birthday party for the son of some family friends.  This party was at 
> Chucky
> Cheese.  And it felt a little like the bowling alley party all over again.
> I
> didn't have any responsibilities that time because I wasn't organizing the
> party, but still the noise and crowd made it hard for me to navigate and
> independently interacte with other adults and children.
>
> So, could some of you please share your experiences with birthday parties?
> If you have any techniques or suggestions I'd really appreciate them.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Allison
>
>
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>
> Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that 
> never hurts.
>
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