[blparent] Choosing Your Battles with Your Children

[Barbara Hammel]

Does this child have respect for anyone?  If he does, maybe that's the 
person who should try sitting down with him and figure out how to help him. 
Maybe even sit down with Deven yourself and talk about the things you don't 
like and ask him what he thinks you should do to discipline him.  Would be 
interesting to know what he thinks a discipline measure should look 
like--probably he has no clue but ...
Then again, he may know what his currency is and give you an insight that 
you've missed.
Barbara

A Congress that will always do its work in the dark must have something to 
hide.  The people have spoken, yet they do not listen.

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Rhonda Scott" <earthmagic7 at sbcglobal.net>
Sent: Tuesday, January 12, 2010 3:40 PM
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: [blparent] Choosing Your Battles with Your Children

> Hi all,
>
> How do some of you decide what is worth disciplining for, and what is 
> really not a huge deal? In our house we have quite a bit of fibbing and 
> lying, which is a very sore spot with me. We also have a tiny bit of Deven 
> helping himself to things that don't belong to him because he feels he 
> needs them for something he wants to do, or to food, which I don't mind so 
> much except he eats in the living room and leaves a trail behind him. It 
> really is a matter of asking for that screwdriver he needs to take the lid 
> off a battery compartment to replace the batteries in a toy. But desk 
> drawers where those are kept are 1 of the places off limits. He recently 
> took sewing needles from my sewing box because he wanted to poke holes in 
> something, and he did not take the time to tell me he broke those needles, 
> or to clean up the remnants of the needles.
>
> So I'm frustrated, and trying to learn to pick my battles. I have tried 
> explaining to him that some of the things he does can hurt people, like 
> fragments of needles in carpets, and that asking would really get him a 
> lot further than taking. But no taking away of things or discussing, or 
> explaining are getting me anywhere with him. Nothing he owns seems to mean 
> enough to him that punishing him by taking toys and such away makes any 
> difference.
>
> Thoughts and feedback appreciated.
>
> Rhonda
>
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