[blparent] kids and the park

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

It's hard, Stephanie, I know, because my family always expected a lot of me, 
which was a positive thing in some ways.  But somehow, my best was never 
good enough.  Sooner or later, you have to decide who you're going to 
believe.  I'm still working on it, but I choose to believe that my best is 
good enough, and more than good enough.  I don't have much contact with my 
family anymore, partly because they refused to believe that I could raise a 
child in a clean, stimulating environment that met her needs.  Well, the 
truth is telling itself.  My daughter is bright, happy, and confident. 
Choosing to believe in yourself isn't easy, but it's better than giving in 
and embracing the lies and fears that were handed to you, maybe by 
well-meaning family members, because they didn't know what potential you 
had.

I remember the first time I took my daughter to the playground that's right 
here in the condo complex where I live.  I was afraid, worried that 
something might happen, that I might fail to keep my baby safe in some way, 
all those thoughts that tumble around in your head.  But I took a deep 
breath and went, and everything turned out fine.  Now Sarah and I go all 
over the complex, usually while she's riding her bike.  We've discovered 
leaves, holiday decorations, and friends.  I got lost with her once, and 
that was scary, but I stopped a couple walking their dogs, and eventually 
made it back home.  My daughter ran away from me and wouldn't come back one 
time, and I had to get some other kids at the park to help me round her up. 
I was embarrassed, but we made it home safely, and since we didn't go out to 
the park again for quite a while after that, Sarah decided that running away 
wasn't a wise choice.  I twisted each ankle, on separate occasions while 
helping Sarah climb, and had to limp home twice.  Sarah fell and scraped her 
knee once, and we had to trek home for a Band-Aid.  She's gotten dirty, had 
a few accidents because we couldn't make it home in time to get to the 
bathroom, and in spite of all that, she loves going out and has had loads of 
fun.  I'm saying all this to tell you that some of your worries might come 
true, but in the end, you'll make it home and feel better about yourself 
because of it.  Take a few precautions like having a cell phone or money for 
a pay phone, maybe write down a taxi number and take it with you, and then 
just start out.  You'll build confidence as you go.  And remember, it's not 
a bad thing to ask for help, or directions.  It doesn't mean you failed as a 
blind person--it means you're human.

Jo Elizabeth

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, 
compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of 
the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been all of 
these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Sheila Leigland" <sleigland at bresnan.net>
Sent: Thursday, January 05, 2012 10:54 PM
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: Re: [blparent] kids and the park

> Hi steph I understand where you are coming from. I was told many of the 
> same things. It freaked my mom out to watch me cross a street. I didn't 
> learn much about housework or cooking until I decided to get married. All 
> of this happened after college.  I know you will be okay. It is not 
> posible to be one hundred times better than the sighted world. Twice as 
> good was hard enough. You can only do the best you can noone should ask 
> more of you than that.Mom couldn't imagine me being able to work and 
> maiuntain a house. Old paterns can be hard to break. I had to learn to 
> believe in myself even if others didn't see things that way.
>
> sheila leigland
>
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