[blparent] How do you know you're a mother? (time to lighten up andlaugh)

[Pipi]

hahaha thanks for this.
i can relate to so many of these.
mine would be when a 10 minute shower became equivalent to the luxury of a 
weekend at a spa.
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Jo Elizabeth Pinto" <jopinto at msn.com>
To: "NFBnet Blind Parents Mailing List" <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 6:37 PM
Subject: [blparent] How do you know you're a mother? (time to lighten up 
andlaugh)


>I saw this and thought I'd share.  A little gross, don't read if you're 
>squeamish, but it never hurts to laugh.
>
>
>
> Jo Elizabeth
>
>
>
> A few months ago, I was in the grocery store roaming the bread isle. 
> Wheat, white, pita, English muffins ... Boring, boring, boring. And, then 
> I spotted it: Goldfish Sandwich Bread. There, right in between the milk 
> and the exotic food aisle, I squealed. Bread, in the shape of a giant 
> Goldfish cracker?! My kids would be psyched!! This was the best trip to 
> Safeway EVER!!! Wooo-hooo!
>
> And, then it hit me: I am such a mother.
>
> I asked my friends for their "motherhood moments" and the answers made me 
> laugh -- I can relate to every single one ... What about you?
>
> 25. Your new accessories consist of boogers, spit up and pieces of food on 
> your outfit.  -- Monica
>
> 24. Your kid starts to throw up and you hold out your hands to catch it 
> because you're no where near the toilet. Then you hold the crying child, 
> getting barf in your hair and that's the least of your concerns. -- Amy
>
> 23. When going grocery shopping alone is considered "Me time" -- Lizette
>
> 22. You quietly wipe a butt (and remember to not flush!) while on a 
> business call. --- Laura
>
> 21. Your six year old daughter has more shoes and a cuter wardrobe than 
> you. -- Patti
>
> 20. You pick someone else's boogers and it's no big deal. -- Melissa
>
> 19. You actually like driving a mini van. -- Jody
>
> 18. When you know 1 million things to clean with BABY WIPES! -- Diana
>
> 17. When you feel the need to stick a bottle in the mouth of anyone 
> upset. -- Michelle
>
> 16. You carry human teeth in your purse.  -- Penny
>
> 15. You just forced them into bed and you've had enough then an hour later 
> you're bawling your eyes out at their baby pics. -- Nermeen
>
> 14. You hold your poop till 11 p.m. so that you can go without an 
> audience... -- Evin
>
> 13. ?"What kind of poop was it?" counts as stimulating conversation.  --  
> JoAnna
>
> 12.  When you jam out to the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse song while driving and 
> realize you just dropped off the little one at daycare. -- LeKisha
>
> 11. When you have extra underwear and leggings and emergency fruit snacks 
> stashed in your purse and glove compartment at all times! --- Kathryn
>
> 10. You can do 6 different things at the same time.  -- Donna
>
> 9. You hear a kid going bananas in public and as soon as you see it's not 
> yours, you're thrilled.  -- Stacey
>
> 8. Walk out of the house, realize there's poop on your shirt, and scrape 
> it off with your nail instead of going back inside to change. -- Erin
>
> 7. When you hear someone else's newborn do her little gurgle cry and you 
> think "awww, I wish I could hold her" rather than "OMG make it stop!" --  
> Brandy
>
> 6. You are more likely to find cheese sticks, diapers and yogurt in your 
> purse than a mirror. -- Liana
>
> 5. You spent half the day with a "You Went Potty!!!!" sticker in your hair 
> and no one told you. -- Tiffany
>
> 4. You have embraced the fact that an uninterrupted nap excites you more 
> than uninterrupted sex. -- Kimberly
>
> 3. You clench your nether regions just before a sneeze so you don't 
> pee. -- Kelly
>
> 2. You eat a rogue Froot Loop off the floor and never think twice. And you 
> don't even look around to see if someone's watching. -- Susan
>
> 1. The last thing you do on a vacation is relax.  -- Kimberly
>
>
>
> How did you know you were a mother?
>
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