[blparent] children and trust

[Jo Elizabeth Pinto]

Hi, Shannan.  I totally agree that parents have to be trusted, that they'll 
be fair in dealing witn their own kids and also other kids that are 
involved.  When Gerald and I took Sarah to my grandma's ninetieth birthday 
party, my niece, who is a few years older than Sarah, had it in her head 
that Sarah didn't know how to share.  The way she parroted the remarks about 
Sarah never being around other kids and never learning to share, I could 
tell she'd heard grown-ups talking about it.  That was because my mom and 
sister had very different ideas about preschool than I did.  My sister got 
her kids in activities when they were barely two, which was fine because it 
was her choice, but I chose to keep Sarah at home till she was nearly four. 
So anyway, my niece would put a toy down in front of Sarah, watch her pick 
it up, and then yell because Sarah wasn't sharing.  She did that several 
times, and I averted the situation and redirected Sarah to another activity. 
But you're right, if you weren't watching closely, it would have looked like 
Sarah wasn't sharing.  So the parents have to be fair or their kids won't 
learn to be.  Some of the angelic little girls out there really instigate 
quite a lot of trouble and then stand back innocently and watch the action.

Jo Elizabeth

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, 
compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of 
the weak and the strong.  Because someday in life you will have been all of 
these."--George Washington Carver, 1864-1943, American scientist

--------------------------------------------------
From: "Shannan Zinck" <shannanzinck at gmail.com>
Sent: Saturday, May 26, 2012 2:54 PM
To: <blparent at nfbnet.org>
Subject: [blparent] children and trust

> Just checked the website and that product is unavailable right now. We
> likely don't use our leash enough. Mostly because we don't venture out
> unless it's a group activity with our church or something. In those cases
> someone sighted always has him. We have an amazing network of support here
> with lots of help, and we're together so much that we all look after each
> others kids. When he is allowed to walk places though he has to use his
> leash and hold hands in the hopes that he will get use to that and not 
> have
> the leash for too long. We are a very close nit community though so he 
> gets
> a lot of freedom that likely wouldn't be happening if we didn't have tons
> of support and help. and some of us have been friends for over 15 years 
> and
> I looked after some of their kids when they were little so that helps. We
> had a classic discuss a few weeks ago over our sons behavior. Because some
> of the younger moms with small girls about his age have a hard time with
> his boyish nature. It's been resolved as best as it can be, Only my 
> husband
> and I and the pastor and his wife are allowed to judge wether he deserves 
> a
> timeout or not. the reason for the pastors involvment is because he sees
> through some of the antics us girls and women can go through when it comes
> to blowing things way out of preportion. For a while there I was even
> afraid to let him go to the nursery because it seemed he was always in
> trouble and most times it was for no good reason, my pastors words not
> mine. The kids are watched much more closely now because of this which I 
> am
> grateful because since they have been watched better my son has been
> somewhat vindicated. Doesn't get into trouble as much now that we know 
> what
> is really going on. The girls sometimes provoke him because he reacts
> instead of thinking.I guess not only a leash helps but, keeping a good eye
> on the little ones is essential too. Neither my husband nor I are on
> nursery so we have to rely on the adults to be fair which wasn't happening
> all the time. So sometimes on the rare occasion the question should be not
> only children and trust but, also parents and trust.
>
> -- 
> Shannan Zinck
> Survival is letting GOD take over!!!
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