[blparent] Baby on the Way! Now, Where to Live?

[Mark Feliz]

Congratulations Allison and Darrell, this is so cool. I am very happy
for the both of you. I can not add much more to what has already been
said. My wife workednights when our kids were young so I had them
alone most of the day while she slept. I think you will need to factor
in the cost for transportation into your budget. Since you will not
probably own a car just think of it as a car payment. I was not near a
convenient bus stop but doable. I used a combination of bus, ara, and
cab. With the invent of Uber this will be easy. I also paid friends on
occasion when necessary. As mentioned don't worry about how you are
going to manage kid, cane, diaper bag... It always works. I would wait
to purchase a house till your child is school ready. You never know
what will happen with school districts and neighborhoods.

Call me if you have questions anytime.

Mark F East valley Chapter.

On 7/24/15, Briley O'Connor via blparent <blparent at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> I forgot to mention, just for your reference, we pay our driver $10 an hour
> plus $.57 per mile.  For our particular needs, we use them approximately 10
> to 15 hours a week. It really depends, but it is somewhere in the
> neighborhood of about $200 a month. That sounds like a lot, but considering
> we do not have a car payment for car insurance, it is really a steal. Being
> independent does not always mean meeting access to public transportation.
> It is more about what independence looks like for you.
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
>> On Jul 23, 2015, at 9:01 PM, Judy Jones via blparent <blparent at nfbnet.org>
>> wrote:
>>
>> I can't say enough about the ability to get where you want to go, when you
>> need to go, whether you take a vehicle or walk, as long as you can
>> conveniently get where you want to go.  I can speak to this, as my husband
>> and I, too, are both blind.
>>
>> And this need for freedom of mobility is even more important when you do
>> have kids.
>>
>> The house might be a really good thing, give you room to grow, and a
>> quieter place of your own.  But:  the one bus stop.  is it easily get
>> tooable?  Does it run often enough so you can take it when you need it and
>> does it connect to most of the places you know and frequent.  What you
>> don't want is to become a prisoner in a beautiful ideal castle.
>>
>> You will want to be within easy walking distance of stores and schools,
>> and to make sure you can get to a doctor's office as you need it.  Imagine
>> yourself being the independent parent you need to be and should be, taking
>> your child where they need to be and when they need to be there, and think
>> through how you will get that done.  Granted, it is nice when the kiddos
>> can get rides from other sighted parents, but do not depend on that.
>> Always have an independent backup, otherwise you will be at the mercy of
>> someone else's schedule.
>>
>> You'll find it easier to maybe live in a smaller place but with great
>> transportation, which can give you the mobility you want.  If your
>> suburban house has good transportation options, go for it, at least check
>> it out. Ask about the neighborhood if you haven't already done so.  If you
>> are buying, you will have to envision the big picture, years down the
>> road, will the area stay quiet, or are they about to make your street a
>> main artery with busy traffic?
>>
>> About modes of travel with Baby.  Whatever is the easiest and cost
>> effective for you.  Take cues from your baby.  If a noisy bus bothers
>> them, maybe at first, a cab would be easy.  However, there are babies that
>> do just fine with noise, while others get over-stimulated and upset.
>>
>> How long of a walk is too long?  Take the cues from your child.  Start out
>> with short walks, then you can always lengthen them.
>>
>> I had to chuckle at your question about juggling baby and cane on stairs,
>> making one crazy.  When all is said and done, you will be amazed at what
>> you manage to juggle, how you do it.  These are things you grow into, just
>> as your baby is growing, along with your relationship.  You will end up
>> juggling much more and definitely in crazy situations, but more than
>> likely love every minute of it, because it's really all about your child.
>>
>> Revisiting the house thing again.  If you are renting, you may or may not
>> plan to stay in that house for very long if you plan to buy in future.
>> But if you are buying, you will definitely want to imagine yourselves
>> living in the area for years, seeing your child grow up there, know what
>> you can walk to and how you can get there.  Pay close attention to the
>> intersections you will have to cross and do a walk-through before making
>> an offer.
>>
>> A nightmare scenario that happened to us, and this was before kids.  My
>> husband and I worked in Orlando, and we found the perfect house, perfect
>> price, in Winter Park.  We had driven around the neighborhood with our
>> realtor, and she had explained we were close to a bus stop at a lighted
>> intersection.  There was also a convenience store there at that
>> intersection, and she said there was a double set of lights, but they were
>> regular traffic lights.  We should have caught on then what we were
>> getting into, but we didn't.
>>
>> We decided to put an offer, it was accepted, and she drove us over to the
>> house the evening before the closing to answer a few of our last minute
>> questions.
>>
>> We decided to actually walk through the intersection where we would need
>> to catch our bus.  Horror of horrors, the intersection had a double set of
>> lights, because it is offset.  In other words, you would start to cross at
>> one corner but needed to jog left several yards to reach the opposite
>> corner.  In the middle of this so-called jog on the other side of the
>> street is the convenience store parking lot.  So:  We would have no way to
>> know if we were dealing with parallel traffic or cross traffic since the
>> oncoming parallel traffic would have to pass in front of us to continue,
>> let alone the traffic pulling out of the store parking lot.
>>
>> We could not think our way out of this one, and was super frustrating to
>> have good mobility, yet be unable to navigate intersections because of
>> stupid geography and bad city planning, as far as I was concerned.
>>
>> We ended the evening deciding we could not close on the house.  The
>> realtor understood our needs, and fortunately, so did the seller.  We had
>> already given notice at our apartment, and was very embarrassing to ask
>> for it back, fortunately we were able to get it.  That was a rough couple
>> days, not sure if we had any place to go, and were checking with friends
>> to see if we could camp out until we found a place.
>>
>> Moral of the story, walk it through, literally, before you make a
>> commitment.
>>
>> My husband and I have bought and sold, now, four houses, and never did
>> that scenario come up again.
>>
>> Best wishes, and keep us informed.
>>
>> Judy, whose girls are now 29 and 25.
>>
>> -----Original Message----- From: Allison via blparent
>> Sent: Thursday, July 23, 2015 5:30 PM
>> To: 'Blind Parents Mailing List'
>> Cc: Allison
>> Subject: [blparent] Baby on the Way! Now, Where to Live?
>>
>> Hi Everyone,
>>
>> First a quick intro since, while I've been reading this list for a while,
>> I haven't posted much yet. I did write a couple of times about ovulation
>> kits and pregnancy tests a while back. I'm happy to say that our attempts
>> with ovulation kits were a success, and my fiance and I are expecting our
>> first child this January! We're really excited!
>>
>> My fiance, Darrell,  and I are both blind and currently live in the
>> Phoenix area. We have an apartment with a lease that will be up in
>> September, and we're trying to decide where we want to live next. What
>> we're finding so far is that, most of the houses that we can afford, are
>> further from public transportation than we're used to. We love our current
>> location, but we are looking for more space for when baby arrives. We went
>> house-hunting last weekend, found one house that had a lot of space, a
>> yard, was in our price range, and It was near one bus stop... sorta. We
>> almost made an offer, but Darrell and I came to a hard realization. We're
>> not sure we're quite ready to give up our urban lifestyle in order to
>> become suburban home-owners just yet. We're willing to do it if it turns
>> out best for raising a family, yet we're not sure if that's really
>> necessary.
>>
>> So I'm coming to this list to learn from your collective experience as
>> blind parents. What did you find was and was not really important when
>> choosing a place to live with very young children? As a first time parent,
>> I realize that I don't know what I'll need in terms of location. It's
>> entirely possible that, the things I think are important in a location,
>> aren't at all necessary, and there may be other truly important
>> considerations that haven't even crossed my mind yet. So here are some
>> questions that I'd like to bounce off of you guys...
>>
>> When you had babies or small children, did you find that you rode buses or
>> light rails often? Was it more convenient to take cabs, paratransit, or
>> hired drivers over other transit options? What is too long of a walk with
>> a small child? Is a back yard a must, or is it more important to live near
>> a park/playground? How helpful is it to be in walking or bus distance of
>> restaurants, stores, or doctor offices? Will climbing stairs while
>> juggling a cane, baby, and accessories eventually make us crazy? What of
>> schools? Should I be factoring in proximity to schools if our baby isn't
>> even born yet? What other factors am I not considering but are important?
>>
>> Knowing others' experiences will likely be helpful to us when deciding
>> what location may work best for our family. Any feedback or suggestions
>> from you all are appreciated!
>>
>> Thanks,
>> Allison, Darrell, and Baby
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/jtj1%40cableone.net
>>
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> blparent mailing list
>> blparent at nfbnet.org
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> blparent:
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/brileyoc%40gmail.com
>
> _______________________________________________
> blparent mailing list
> blparent at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/blparent_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> blparent:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/blparent_nfbnet.org/mafeliz0641%40gmail.com
>