[Faith-talk] some updates on Nick, and my day summarized

[Ashley Bramlett]

Debbie,
I have some of the same questions. The emails were not clear; Beth did not 
even explain his disabilities originally.
Some of the issues she brought up do not seem like abuse, IMO.

Not having an iphone is not abuse. Separation from girlfriends in the home 
is not abuse either.
The only thing smelling of abuse is the group home's failure to respect his 
privacy while Beth and he talk.

There are bad and good group homes. And I'd say that some people belong 
there, while others do not. It depends on the disability too; some autistic 
people can live independently and others cannot.

As you proceed Beth, I'd suggest you have a plan in mind what you want to 
have done with him. You do not want  him in a worse situation whether its in 
a group home or someplace else.
Its fine to expose places if they are really doing wrong, if they are really 
abusive, but you then should have a plan to deal with the people in the 
group home. Where should they go and who will care for them? Not everyone 
has family to care  for them, and not everyone can get a competetive job who 
has severe multiple disabilities and even if they have the capacity to live 
on their own, some cannot afford to. Heck, I know many young sighted 
nondisabled people who live with family or friends because they cannot 
afford to live on their own.

So do proceed, but also decide what you want to happen. Do you want to 
expose the group home for what it is? Do you want a call for it to be 
reformed  or closed? Generally when you go to the media about something, you 
want a plan of action and points to discuss with them called talking points.
So figure out what that is and go ahead.

I suspect he is in the group home for other disabilities, not his blindness.


Good luck.

Ashley


-----Original Message----- 
From: Debby Phillips via Faith-talk
Sent: Friday, January 16, 2015 9:52 PM
To: Vejas Vasiliauskas ; Faith-talk,for the discussion of faith and religion 
; joltingjacksandefur at gmail.com ; faith-talk at nfbnet.org
Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] some updates on Nick, and my day summarized

Perhaps some of us have missed some earlier emails.  Please Beth,
articulately explain how this group home has abused Nick.  You
say he cannot have an iphone.  Well, they are expensive.  Perhaps
Nick doesn't have enough money for one.  You say that Nick has to
follow rules, and can't talk to his girlfriend.  Please explain
why.  Why was Nick placed in the group home in the first place?
Who made the decision? Has Nick been on his own before? If so,
what happened? If I were a pastor of his church, I would want to
know these things.  I have seen people who absolutely should NOT
be on their own.  Not just because they can't do stuff on their
own, but because they are vulnerable and people have taken
advantage of them.  Please don't misunderstand me here.  No one
should be abused, and if that is happening then there are good
ways to handle these things.  Getting the media involved may
indeed have to be done.  But we need to use prudence.  And if I
were a pastor, I would want to know more facts.  People get
excited and emotional about when they hear someone is in a bad
situation.  Believe me, I will and have advocated for people who
were not getting what they needed.  But I had all my facts, and
eventually did get what was needed to happen.    Blessings,
Debby and Neena

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