[Faith-talk] Relationship issues

Mon May 15 21:46:18 UTC 2017

Hope she is doing well! Your son or daughter is due around my birthday. 

Ericka Short
1750 Fordem Ave. #508
Madison. WI. 53704
608-665-3170

 from my iPhone 6+

> On May 14, 2017, at 10:21 PM, mr. Chikodinaka Nickarandidum Oguledo via Faith-Talk <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> 
> he gives bithChildbirth on November 30th 2017 My wife lady Adonnih.
> Happiness Oguledo
> 
>> On 5/14/17, Jenny Keller via Faith-Talk <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>> My taekwondo teacher feels exactly the same way :-) my orange belt proves it
>> 
>> 
>> Jenny
>> 
>>> On May 14, 2017, at 7:32 PM, David Moore via Faith-Talk
>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>> 
>>> Wow, Jenny!
>>> Amen! That is all I can say! The relationship I have with the Lord is much
>>> better than what I have with my own wife, and that is the way it should
>>> be. I asked Traci right out if she love God more than me. I can’t describe
>>> the joy and pease I have through my relationship with God. At 20 years
>>> old, I thought that I would meet a dream wife, but now at 51, I totally
>>> agree with you. Those men who abused you, if I had it my way, they would
>>> not be able to walk LOL! If my daughter was abused by a man, I believe
>>> that God would be fine with me beating him unconscious. It is time women
>>> start sticking up for themselves and realizing they deserve the best or
>>> just have a relationship with the Lord. Women do not need a man. So many
>>> women need to get that out of their head. All we really need is God. I
>>> cry, I really do, over men abusing them, because women think they better
>>> seddle or have nobody! I do not want any of you women seddling. If I had a
>>> daughter, I would scare most guys away LOL! I think all women need to take
>>> martial arts training or something so they can protect themselves. God has
>>> no problem with that. Men, need to have a relationship with God to see how
>>> to treat a woman. How would God treat a woman? That is what a man needs to
>>> ask. I talk to women all of the time about the kind of man God would want
>>> them to marry, and they just sigh and say, my that would be wonderful. I
>>> can tell that these women think I am telling them a fary tail. It is so
>>> sad that people are raised in environments where abuse is just normal like
>>> eating. People really think that life is supposed to be like that. I cry
>>> over this. Mom always said that if she had a daughter, she would knock a
>>> man out for looking at her LOL! Men need to know that a relationship with
>>> the Lord is much more important than a physical relationship. Men will be
>>> men, I guess. Even King David in the Bible had a man killed so he could
>>> take his wife. That is in theBible. I wish I had all of the answers for
>>> helping men to treat a woman finer than gold. Fathers raise their sons to
>>> be players. That is so sad. It all goes back to how we are raised. I am a
>>> huge believer that the way we are as adults is 95 percent due to how we
>>> were raised and told from the cradle. The actions from our parents make a
>>> person the way he is as an adult. I hope things change someday, and Women
>>> wil not put everything over having a man, and a man will develop a
>>> relationship with God before he thinks about a woman. If you do not love
>>> yourself and God first, you will never love your partner. It cannot
>>> happen.
>>> Take care, all.
>>> David Moore
>>> Sent from Mail for Windows 10
>>> 
>>> From: Jenny Keller via Faith-Talk
>>> Sent: Sunday, May 14, 2017 7:38 PM
>>> To: Faith-talk, for the discussion of Blindness in faith and religion
>>> Cc: Jenny Keller
>>> Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] Relationship issues
>>> 
>>> Hi,
>>> 
>>> I ask forgiveness for the way this message is written. I don't have a
>>> Bluetooth keyboard and dictation is dictation. I went through some of
>>> that. I've always dated with the intention of marriage. Not just to mess
>>> around. However, I didn't stick to no sex before marriage. Except for one
>>> relationship that freaked me out because I was pregnant unwed pregnant and
>>> I didn't know what to do. Not in that kind of relationship not yet being
>>> pregnant and without anyone.
>>> 
>>> Both marriages were doomed to failure and had red flags from the
>>> beginning. I was too blind and too stupid to realize that. I always wanted
>>> to give people a chance. And, I excepted them for who they were. And, that
>>> wasn't always the best thing to do.
>>> 
>>> I have discovered that my faith comes first. And, unfortunately. Probably,
>>> I am much too selfish for marriage. I have physical issues that make it
>>> very difficult for someone to deal with a marriage with me. I am on able
>>> to do a lot of housework. Though mobility is my thing.
>>> 
>>> My last marriage though, threw that in my face. Oh you never do any
>>> housework or help me around the house. I had told him from the beginning
>>> don't start doing housework and expect me to do it five years from now,
>>> and then throw it in my face later. That's exactly what happened. So, I
>>> don't see myself in a relationship. I don't want to hear that crap from
>>> anybody else. Heavenly father is my husband. My best friend. Everything.
>>> 
>>> I'm not just saying this to say it. I just want people to understand, I
>>> know that marriages can be wonderful. I also know that marriages can be
>>> disaster. I have seen both, and mostly disaster. I have been abused both
>>> mentally and physically by men. And not by my husband, but by other men
>>> that I have dated. From starting my life with abuse from my mother
>>> mentally emotionally and physically that's not exactly something you
>>> recover from. Counseling is great. Prayer is great. But the scars are
>>> still there.
>>> 
>>> Heavenly father makes it to where they can be dealt with, or at least even
>>> know they're there, you still can leave a successful and loving life. I
>>> guess what I'm saying is. I understand what that gentleman said about just
>>> not looking for marriage or a relationship. I am afraid of one anyway. I
>>> go to church and they're single functions. However, funny thing enough
>>> there's like way more than singles women then there are men :-) I guess
>>> because I'm over the 31 section of single :-) I believe that I am going to
>>> wait I know I am going to wait for someone who is more men best time. I
>>> didn't always stick to that faith. I looked around at every other
>>> Christian faith. But I returned now the third time, with the understanding
>>> that I am there for a reason. I left because of typing issues. I was
>>> completely against it. But after talking to my bishop, Pastor, I realize
>>> that it was not just a commandment of the Lord, but that even though
>>> people are really broke. They put their faith in the Lord by tightening.
>>> That my bishop who is a doctor. Wasn't always a doctor :-)
>>> 
>>> I love everybody and the list. It is wonderful to see the beauty in
>>> relationships. And please understand, I'm not just trying to be
>>> pessimistic. I guess I just want those who are worried about
>>> relationships, gun shy, ET see that it is OK to not want to marry or to be
>>> single and want to stay that way. Because sometimes, the Lord drop
>>> something in our life that we are not expecting. You never know :-)
>>> 
>>> I pray for everyone married single or thinking about it. Love is always
>>> there with our heavenly father and Jesus Christ. That's the most wonderful
>>> Love we could ever have. Never forget that any of us.
>>> 
>>> Your sister in Christ always
>>> 
>>> 
>>> Jenny
>>> 
>>>> On May 14, 2017, at 12:03 AM, Chikodinaka Ogoledo via Faith-Talk
>>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>>> 
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>>>> Original Message:
>>>> From: David Moore via Faith-Talk <faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
>>>> To: "Faith-talk, for the discussion of Blindness in faith and religion"
>>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org>
>>>> CC: David Moore <jesusloves1966 at gmail.com>
>>>> Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] Relationship issues
>>>> Date: Thu, 11 May 2017 00:16:10 -0400
>>>> 
>>>> Hi all,
>>>> David Moore here. I must tell you how Jesus Christ brought me to Traci my
>>>> wife. I was born with enough sight to ride a bike, see colors, and to
>>>> read very large print. I have had light perception since I was 15. I am
>>>> now 51. At 21, I had a 9-month serious relationship with a totally blind
>>>> girl. I realize we were totally wrong for each other, because she had
>>>> blind Christian faith, where I was really searching and had not yet
>>>> become a Christian. I studied the Bible and knew it well, but I still had
>>>> questions, and Lin expected me to just believe it because the Bible says
>>>> so, so we parted ways. I was friends with a lot, of mostly sighted women.
>>>> Many of these women thought I was too good for them to date. They would
>>>> say something like you're a nice teddy bear, and I do not want to ruin
>>>> our friendship. You are like a sweet brother and friend, they would say.
>>>> They always complained to me about their abusive boyfriends. I would say
>>>> to them that they should try one date with me, and there would be no
>>>> strings attached. They would not go for it. All these women friends did
>>>> was to complain about their boyfriends to me LOL! My second relationship
>>>> was between the time I was 26 and 28. We talked about marriage. She was
>>>> sighted. Her mom would tell Mindy all the time that I could not provide
>>>> for her and all of that. Her mom would barely talk to me, and she told
>>>> Mindy to break up with me all the time, just because I was blind. Her mom
>>>> would not even give me a chance. She started coming around a little bit,
>>>> but I started getting tired of Mindy being so dependent on her parents.
>>>> She was 30 at the time, and she went and cried to her mom and Dad
>>>> everytime we had an argument. She had been so sheltered in a Christian
>>>> home, and she had not experienced the world like I had. Before I became a
>>>> Christian, I got wasted in college, partied, and was very rebellious
>>>> against my parents. Mindy had not gone through any of that. We had
>>>> totally different childhoods, and we grew apart. I never married her; and
>>>> if I had, we would had divorced, I just know it. I told myself as a
>>>> teenager that I would date someone for four years before getting married,
>>>> because of my mom and dad's marriage. Mom said that she had hated dad for
>>>> years, and never wanted to see his face. Mom talked to me about her hate
>>>> for dad, and said she would kill herself. She threatened to kill herself
>>>> a lot, and said it was because she got married. Mom told all three of us
>>>> boys to never get married, because we would havehell on earth like she
>>>> did. She told all of us to just shack up with a woman and never get
>>>> married. I knew that was not right, because a neighbor began taking me to
>>>> church when I was 15. I knew that something was different after a few
>>>> times of going to church, and I knew there had to be a god to create all
>>>> that is and on and on. Well, back to Mindy. I broke up with her, because
>>>> our childhoods had been so different, and she ran to mom and dad over
>>>> anything. So, I had broken up with two women by then who I had talked
>>>> about marriage with. I knew these were not the women the Lord wanted me
>>>> to have as a wife. I was not even a Christian yet. I had a third
>>>> relationship, but it was not right either. Then, I met my wife Traci. I
>>>> became a Christian shortly after we started dating. Listen to how we met.
>>>> I was with a sighted friend, and he wanted to finish his coffee while we
>>>> were at the bus stop. We let two busses pass by, and we boarded the third
>>>> bus. Traci lived at the other end of town than I. Her car had broken
>>>> down, and she happened to be on that bus. Now, she had heard me on the
>>>> radio. I played a Bible Trivia show every Thursday night at 1:30 in the
>>>> morning. One night, Traci turned on the radio and flipped the dial
>>>> looking for something to listen to. She ran across this Bible show that I
>>>> called in to play on, and she heard my voice on the radio and thought I
>>>> was very spiritual and full of joy. She kept listening to the show every
>>>> week, and then there I was on that bus that day. Her car had broken down,
>>>> and she was at my end of town. She heard my voice as I talked to my
>>>> friend, and she knew it was the guy she listened to on the radio every
>>>> week. I really felt the Lord had told me, even before becoming a
>>>> Christian, that I should wait until after marriage to have sex, because
>>>> it would be so good if I waited, and that was the right think to do. I
>>>> had gone to church since I was 15 as well. So, I met Traci on that bus,
>>>> and I gave her my phone number, because her phone had not been put in
>>>> yet. She had just moved. She called me back three days later, and we
>>>> talked for nine hours. It was like we had known each other for our entire
>>>> lives. Guess what? My blindness never came up in that entire
>>>> conversation. Traci is totally sighted, and my blindness is nothing to
>>>> her. She had a bad childhood like I did, Became a Christian after much
>>>> rebellion, and she was very independent and determined to assert herself.
>>>> LOL! This quality had been missing in all of the other Christian girls I
>>>> dated. They had all been sheltered in church their entire lives, and new
>>>> nothing about the world, or different kinds of people outside their small
>>>> circle. But Traci was totally different. She had been in the mud, and had
>>>> Called out to the Lord, and she had gone through a lot before she got
>>>> close to the Lord, just like me. Well, I finally became a Christian after
>>>> going to church for 18 years, at the age of 33. I had been in every faith
>>>> circle there is. I had studied everything. But Jesus finally showed me
>>>> that he is the only way, and Traci is the same. Both of us are so strong
>>>> in our faith, because the Lord has brought us through hell on earth, and
>>>> we are still fighting to this day. We have really gone through a lot
>>>> since we met in 1997. I could go on for days in this message, but I want
>>>> to leave you with a few thoughts. One:
>>>> I waited until I was 31 before I met Traci, and I was not looking for
>>>> anyone. I was happy with my life the way it was, and I had a lot of
>>>> friends. The number one goal in my life was not to get married. I would
>>>> have waited until I was 50 to meet the right woman to marry! I believe
>>>> the person you should marry should love God more than they love you.
>>>> Also, a person needs to love him or herself before they can love anyone
>>>> else. A person needs to be in total acceptance of their blindness. When I
>>>> met Traci, she was totally sighted, and she hardly talks about my
>>>> blindness. I mean, it hardly comes up until I need her help for something
>>>> that I cannot see. We joke about my blindness. I laugh with friends about
>>>> being blind and how fun it is. Did you hear that? I think being blind is
>>>> exciting, because I can talk to many more people about the Lord. Everyone
>>>> wants to talk with me on the street, and I take advantage of that, and
>>>> talk to them about where real happiness comes from. I tell them that it
>>>> does not come from what the eyes can see. When Traci and I are together,
>>>> people tell us that we look so happy and full of joy. We married in 2002,
>>>> and we are coming up on 15 years of marriage.
>>>> Well, I better stop. I am sorry if I have written way too much here. Take
>>>> care, and have a great one.
>>>> David Moore
>>>> Sent from Mail for Windows 10
>>>> 
>>>> From: Kevin LaRose via Faith-Talk
>>>> Sent: Wednesday, May 10, 2017 9:15 PM
>>>> To: Faith-talk, for the discussion of Blindness in faith and religion
>>>> Cc: Kevin LaRose
>>>> Subject: Re: [Faith-talk] Relationship issues
>>>> 
>>>> I absolutely agree that this is a topic that isn't discussed nearly
>>>> enough and needs to be discussed more. Having said that, I wonder if this
>>>> is the proper venue for such a discussion. While faith and relationship
>>>> issues are undeniably linked, topics such as this one have the potential
>>>> to go seriously off the rails. Sadly, I've seen it happen. That is up to
>>>> the discretion of the moderators, of course, but I will put in one nugget
>>>> of wisdom I've learned in my 52 plus years of life on this mortal coil.
>>>> Whatever you do, always be true to yourself. Once you change because
>>>> that's what you think the other person wants or needs you to, you've gone
>>>> a long way toward losing the battle. Again, I speak from hard experience
>>>> here. Best of luck to you.
>>>> 
>>>> Kevin LaRose
>>>> Anderson, IN
>>>> Email: kl1964 at icloud.com
>>>> 
>>>> On May 10, 2017, at 6:38 PM, Ericka via Faith-Talk
>>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>>> 
>>>> Sorry for a long reply! Sometimes I think this will bring on more
>>>> questions then it will answer anything. Remember one of the fruits of the
>>>> spirit of patients so let's all work on this now.
>>>> 
>>>> Bill, you bring up an interesting topic of which I agree does not get
>>>> discussed too often. I guess perhaps people can share more testimonies of
>>>> how they found their sweethearts. Not everybody is married here and this
>>>> is probably a topic that should also be brought up in training centers
>>>> during seminar time or philosophy class as well as in conventions etc. As
>>>> the faith connection goes, most Churches teachings see family and
>>>> marriage is something very sacred and not just a right of passage. I
>>>> wonder if there are people out there who feel like they are outsiders
>>>> just because they are not able to seek out decent people and fullfill
>>>> their Faith by adding to the cloud of witnesses or however you want to
>>>> state it. Personally I have no love life advice! I was one of those lost
>>>> souls that never dated but had guy friends until almost 30. That didn't
>>>> go so well and after 15 years of marriage we parted respectfully. He had
>>>> perfect vision if he wore his glasses.  I met him through campus
>>>> ministry. If it was not a long-distance relationship we probably never
>>>> would have dated so long or married.  I don't know what the answer is to
>>>> your great question Bill! Aside from your concerns I think it may be a
>>>> societal problem that we are stuck in the middle of too. There's the
>>>> Blind/sighted debate I will leave be.
>>>> 
>>>> I'm just very happy to have found the right one at 45 and he just happens
>>>> to be totally blind now. I say now because when I met him when we were
>>>> teenagers he had more visual than I did - 20/100 in the best eye. For me
>>>> as was stated, for a girl it's how you live out your faith, what's in
>>>> your heart, and how you treat others in your family that matters more
>>>> than anything else. How you treat family and others tells us how you're
>>>> going to treat us in the end.
>>>> 
>>>> Anyone else have some faithful thoughts? Perhaps some scripture?  I know
>>>> some church cultures kind of help people match each other up - that
>>>> courting concept. Has anybody in a church where that goes on then
>>>> supported in finding a helpmate? Is there any societal or spiritual rules
>>>> anymore for dating? Sometimes I wonder! My mother freaked me out or year
>>>> or two ago by saying she didn't care if I shacked up with someone as long
>>>> as they treated me right. Her take was that the federal laws didn't
>>>> support us being married and she wanted us to be able to pay the bills.
>>>> She said lots of senior citizens doing the same thing. I really don't
>>>> like the concept of shacking up, but God knows the nations rules too. How
>>>> does one  honor faith, family, & the call to be Partners with someone God
>>>> has given you?
>>>> 
>>>> Ericka Short
>>>> 1750 Fordem Ave. #508
>>>> Madison. WI. 53704
>>>> 608-665-3170
>>>> 
>>>> from my iPhone 6+
>>>> 
>>>>> On May 10, 2017, at 12:12 PM, Bill Outman via Faith-Talk
>>>>> <faith-talk at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>>>> 
>>>>> Good day, folks.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> I know the list hasn't been very active of late but there is something I
>>>>> need to explore with all of you to see where it goes.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> I am concerned in general about the difficulties we face as blind and
>>>>> visually impaired people when it comes to seeking romance, how to go
>>>>> about
>>>>> it and how to know if a particular relationship is potentially viable,
>>>>> and
>>>>> the ground rules, if any exist, for behavior within such a potential
>>>>> relationship.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> I would appreciate your thoughts, experiences and prayers on this
>>>>> matter.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> It's something that has caused great frustration, as there seems to be
>>>>> sparse attention paid to this issue.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> By the way, if any of you ladies would like by any chance like to
>>>>> explore
>>>>> with me where something could go, please get back to me off list and
>>>>> we'll
>>>>> touch base.
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> Bill Outman
>>>>> 
>>>>> Daytona Beach, Florida
>>>>> 
>>>>> Email: woutman at earthlink.net
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> 
>>>>> ---
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> -- 
> for if you persavear. you will conker never fear. try try try again
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