[nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
Joshua Lester
jlester8462 at students.pccua.edu
Mon Mar 26 01:37:29 UTC 2012
Hi, Brian.
I know plenty of blind women, who are endependent!
Didn't you say in a previous post, that you were an aspiring DJ?
Why not try to apply to work for this station?
http://www.wics.cc
The owner of this station, is an endependent blind woman!
Please try to show more compassion!
Thanks, Desiree, for the great post!
I'm in agreement with you!
Blessings, Joshua
On 3/25/12, Brian Hatgelakas <brian.hatgelakas at verizon.net> wrote:
> In my experiences with visually handicapped women most of them I've
> encountered that are at my age level are uneducated and still living under
> their parents roof. My rule is that any woman I date should be on the same
> level both chronologically and mentally as I am. I've graduated college and
> have been on my own since 2003. I am very independent.
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "jeff crouch" <jeffanel at gmail.com>
> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
> Sent: Sunday, March 25, 2012 5:24 PM
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>
>
>> Yeah, I would like to try dating a VI Girl, just to see what it would
>> be like, But unfornchely their is no one hear in flint.
>>
>> On 3/25/12, Brian Hatgelakas <brian.hatgelakas at verizon.net> wrote:
>>> Me neither. But I am just warning Jeff to be careful. Back then when I
>>> went on dates I enjoyed myself very much. But I noticed during the High
>>> School years most girls weren't as accepting of me and I had more luck
>>> with
>>> dating during college than high school. But again during the few times I
>>> dated as a teen I had fun.
>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>> From: "Ignasi Cambra" <ignasicambra at gmail.com>
>>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Sunday, March 25, 2012 9:43 AM
>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>
>>>
>>>>I don't see anything wrong with dating during high school. It was fun!!!
>>>>
>>>> Sent from my iPhone
>>>>
>>>> On Mar 25, 2012, at 7:17 AM, Brian Hatgelakas
>>>> <brian.hatgelakas at verizon.net> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> @Jeff my advice to you is wait until college to start dating. I did
>>>>> this
>>>>> and am very happy I did. By doing this the women by the time you
>>>>> enter
>>>>>
>>>>> college will be much more mature and accepting of your blindness
>>>>> situation. Right now as a teenager make friends and don't get caught up
>>>>> in something you know won't last. Because at your age its mostly
>>>>> figuring out who you are and that's the same for girls. Good luck in
>>>>> your studies and don't worry as you get older your chance to date will
>>>>> be
>>>>>
>>>>> hear before you know it.
>>>>> ----- Original Message ----- From: "jeff crouch" <jeffanel at gmail.com>
>>>>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>>>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
>>>>> Sent: Saturday, March 24, 2012 7:11 PM
>>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>> ah, it must be nice being of legal age, but i am 15, and I would like
>>>>>> to be in a releasonship, but the practicablity of this happening is
>>>>>> slim, with school, and extra crickler activatives things would not
>>>>>> really work out, but as i said, it would be nice.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> in a onist way of putting it, from a adault point of view, it would be
>>>>>> pointless for me to get in a releationship because it is just over
>>>>>> reactive hormons that would get in the way and then after a wile
>>>>>> things would simmer down, and hear that person go's, on the hunt
>>>>>> again.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> this is my point of view
>>>>>>
>>>>>> but i think you would have good luck in the online dating world, but
>>>>>> as one of the posters said, becareful, i know from experence, my
>>>>>> friend did that online stuff, and then well to putt it i have not seen
>>>>>> her for quite some years, she went missing, so be careful
>>>>>>
>>>>>> don't mean to sound like a dad, lol
>>>>>>
>>>>>> every one have a good day, and if anyone needs to contact me, you can
>>>>>> email me at
>>>>>> jeffanel at gmail.com
>>>>>> or
>>>>>> kd8qiq at arrl.net
>>>>>>
>>>>>> with love and respect
>>>>>> Jeff Crouch
>>>>>>
>>>>>> On 3/24/12, Amy Sabo <amylsabo at comcast.net> wrote:
>>>>>>> Hello doug,
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials with you and mellissa. I'm
>>>>>>> sooo
>>>>>>> happy for the both of you! Here's wishing you both good health and
>>>>>>> happiness.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Take care and, I will talk to you soon.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Hugs,
>>>>>>> amy
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>>> From: nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>>>> Behalf
>>>>>>> Of Doug Oliver
>>>>>>> Sent: Thursday, March 22, 2012 8:05 PM
>>>>>>> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> we are.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>> From: "Beth" <thebluesisloose at gmail.com>
>>>>>>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>>>>>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
>>>>>>> Sent: Thursday, March 22, 2012 8:28 PM
>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Doug, good luck with your fiancee. I hope the two of you are
>>>>>>> still working.
>>>>>>> Beth
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>> From: "Doug Oliver" <oliver.doug1 at gmail.com
>>>>>>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>>>>>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> Date sent: Thu, 22 Mar 2012 19:54:51 -0500
>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> I'm gonna way in on this topic.
>>>>>>> My fiancee is actually sited and I'm blind, she's been around
>>>>>>> blind people
>>>>>>> growing up, so she's very much accustomed to dating a blind
>>>>>>> person.
>>>>>>> We've met in person twice and it's been great.
>>>>>>> Take care,
>>>>>>> Doug
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>> From: "Ashley" <cumbiambera2005 at gmail.com
>>>>>>> To: "National Association of Blind Students mailing list"
>>>>>>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> Sent: Thursday, March 22, 2012 7:42 PM
>>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Hello all,
>>>>>>> Like some of the people who have posted already, I have had my
>>>>>>> own
>>>>>>> experiences with dating, as well as simply meeting people online.
>>>>>>> As a
>>>>>>> matter of fact, my current boyfriend is someone I met online, and
>>>>>>> he
>>>>>>> is blind as well. We have been dating a little over a year now,
>>>>>>> and I
>>>>>>> have also had the chance to meet him in person. I can say that
>>>>>>> some of
>>>>>>> what we've been through, especially when we met, was both good
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> bad, and even though he is blind, it was a little more disastrous
>>>>>>> because of his family who are sighted. Well the first time we
>>>>>>> actually
>>>>>>> got to "see" each other was through a webcam, and both families
>>>>>>> were
>>>>>>> present, not only for descriptive purposes but also because of us
>>>>>>> being long distance, and it was the only way the two families
>>>>>>> could
>>>>>>> meet. About 6 months later I got to visit him in person, and that
>>>>>>> was
>>>>>>> a little weird because he lives in another country, and a part of
>>>>>>> another culture, and that in itself brings its own barriers. I
>>>>>>> actually stayed at his house with his family, and I imagine it
>>>>>>> was
>>>>>>> hard on them because they've never dealt with another blind
>>>>>>> person
>>>>>>> besides him, and he is not as independent as I am. I have also
>>>>>>> met
>>>>>>> sighted people online, but I did not meet them through dating
>>>>>>> sites. I
>>>>>>> met them through pages we both visit, (blogs, etc), and in my
>>>>>>> opinion,
>>>>>>> that's better because you're actually meeting people you have
>>>>>>> things
>>>>>>> in common with, regardless of whether you date or not, and like
>>>>>>> most
>>>>>>> people have said already, one of the main things to consider when
>>>>>>> dating someone, blind or sighted, is what kinds of things you
>>>>>>> share in
>>>>>>> common with the other person. I personally have never dated a
>>>>>>> sighted
>>>>>>> person, but I have made some interesting friends online who are
>>>>>>> sighted. Some know I'm blind, and some do not, but not because I
>>>>>>> haven't wanted to tell them. I don't meet these people in person
>>>>>>> mainly because most of them are not from the U.S. and therefore
>>>>>>> it
>>>>>>> really hasn't come up. Besides, I'm not as close to them, and we
>>>>>>> mainly talk about music, which is what i have in common with most
>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>> these people I meet anyway. I have also met blind friends online,
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> basically the same goes for them. So as most people have already
>>>>>>> said,
>>>>>>> I don't think it's that much different dating a sighted person
>>>>>>> from a
>>>>>>> blind person. A blind person might be a little more understanding
>>>>>>> considering they go through some of the same things. But on the
>>>>>>> other
>>>>>>> side, that may not always be the case, if the person isn't
>>>>>>> completely
>>>>>>> adjusted to their blindness, or they have been with their family
>>>>>>> their
>>>>>>> entire life, and don't really understand the independence issue
>>>>>>> such
>>>>>>> as in my case. So I think dating both blind and sighted people
>>>>>>> can
>>>>>>> have their ups and downs, and it's just a matter of knowing how
>>>>>>> to
>>>>>>> handle each situation as it comes. Good luck.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On 3/22/12, Arielle Silverman <arielle71 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> Hi all,
>>>>>>> I have a little experience with online dating, but not much. I
>>>>>>> was on
>>>>>>> a dating site for a year or so and chatted with a few guys but
>>>>>>> didn't
>>>>>>> find anyone I actually wanted to meet in person. I have a lot of
>>>>>>> friends (sighted and blind) who do online dating and I've heard
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> whole gamut, from happily-ever-after marriages to disastrous
>>>>>>> first
>>>>>>> dates and a few people who walked away after my friend's
>>>>>>> blindness was
>>>>>>> revealed online. It really doesn't hurt to try it. If you do
>>>>>>> find
>>>>>>> someone you like and want to meet, it's best to meet them in a
>>>>>>> public
>>>>>>> place. But there's nothing dangerous about just putting a
>>>>>>> profile up
>>>>>>> and seeing what happens.
>>>>>>> Some dating sites are free and others charge a fee for joining.
>>>>>>> Interestingly, the site I used was free, and when I was visiting
>>>>>>> my
>>>>>>> sister and her roommate they were checking out one of the paid
>>>>>>> sites.
>>>>>>> I told them about the free site I was on and they looked at it
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> said they thought the guys on the free site were a lot more
>>>>>>> attractive
>>>>>>> and appealing than the guys on the paid one. So it's possible
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> people you might meet on a free site are less "desperate" and
>>>>>>> hence
>>>>>>> are better catches.
>>>>>>> I'm sure there's a lot of debate about when to reveal blindness
>>>>>>> during
>>>>>>> an online dating encounter. Some people put it in their
>>>>>>> profiles,
>>>>>>> others wait until the first meeting and still others reveal it
>>>>>>> at some
>>>>>>> point in the middle. I'd tend to treat it like a job interview
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> reveal blindness after I've connected with someone online but
>>>>>>> before
>>>>>>> we meet in person so they aren't totally shocked or freaked out
>>>>>>> when
>>>>>>> they see me. Unfortunately rejections due to blindness can
>>>>>>> happen at
>>>>>>> any point in the process. You'll have to decide whether you
>>>>>>> would
>>>>>>> prefer to take that risk earlier on or to give them a chance to
>>>>>>> get to
>>>>>>> know you before they learn about your blindness.
>>>>>>> Regarding dating blind vs. sighted people: Like many of us I
>>>>>>> have done
>>>>>>> both. I never consciously decided that I wanted to date a blind
>>>>>>> person
>>>>>>> or a sighted person, and I would not recommend that line of
>>>>>>> thinking.
>>>>>>> I simply dated guys with whom I felt a connection and who felt
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> same way toward me, regardless of whether or not they were
>>>>>>> blind. I
>>>>>>> will say that in some ways establishing the initial relationship
>>>>>>> was
>>>>>>> easier with blind guys, because I didn't have to wonder about
>>>>>>> what
>>>>>>> nonverbal signals they were sending or how they might interpret
>>>>>>> my
>>>>>>> nonverbal signals. However, when I try to compare the
>>>>>>> relationship I
>>>>>>> have had with my sighted boyfriend over the past three years
>>>>>>> with the
>>>>>>> other relationships I have had with blind guys, I really can't
>>>>>>> think
>>>>>>> of any major differences. I do think that regardless of
>>>>>>> blindness
>>>>>>> status, it's important for you and your partner to share
>>>>>>> interests and
>>>>>>> passions in common. NFB and blindness are passions that many of
>>>>>>> us
>>>>>>> share, and they help bring many blind couples together. However,
>>>>>>> there
>>>>>>> are other interests or passions you may share with sighted folks
>>>>>>> around you, and finding a partner who shares one of those
>>>>>>> passions
>>>>>>> with you can be similarly rewarding. In other words, instead of
>>>>>>> deciding who to date based on whether they are sighted or blind,
>>>>>>> I
>>>>>>> think it's more helpful to choose based on how much you share in
>>>>>>> common with them. I know that for us blind folks it can be hard
>>>>>>> to
>>>>>>> meet and connect with people at bars or large gatherings like
>>>>>>> singles'
>>>>>>> parties. But if you can find communities of people that share
>>>>>>> your
>>>>>>> interests-whether that be your local NFB chapter or student
>>>>>>> division,
>>>>>>> classes, church groups or clubs you might be in-that's a much
>>>>>>> better
>>>>>>> way to build lasting connections.
>>>>>>> Arielle
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On 3/22/12, Nimer M. Jaber, ICł <nimerjaber1 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> Oops, I missed a point: I wouldn't go to an NFB convention
>>>>>>> simply for
>>>>>>> the dating scene. I'm sure relationships do develop at things
>>>>>>> like
>>>>>>> that, however most people are going to be preoccupied with
>>>>>>> general
>>>>>>> sessions, exhibits, orientation around a huge massive hotel, etc
>>>>>>> etc
>>>>>>> to really pay attention to who's around them for dating.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Later.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On 22.03.2012, Nimer M. Jaber, ICł <nimerjaber1 at gmail.com>
>>>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>>> Hello Robin,
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Or you could just go ahead and do the online dating thing and
>>>>>>> learn
>>>>>>> from it. It has turned out well for some, and not so well for
>>>>>>> others.
>>>>>>> As for the sighted vs. blind thing, I would ask what you want.
>>>>>>> Not
>>>>>>> dating a blind person simply because you think you'll look cool
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> more independent for dating a sighted person will limit your
>>>>>>> options,
>>>>>>> just like not dating a sighted person because you're afraid of
>>>>>>> being
>>>>>>> rejected is crazy as well. We're all individuals. Many blind
>>>>>>> people
>>>>>>> have underlying disabilities, some may not be adjusted to their
>>>>>>> blindness completely, etc but you wouldn't have to
>>>>>>> necessarily
>>>>>>> feel self-conscious about the blindness issues, your appearance,
>>>>>>> etc
>>>>>>> etc. Sighted people in my experience are going to ask many
>>>>>>> questions.
>>>>>>> Especially at first, you'll probably have to do a whole lot more
>>>>>>> educating than dating, and it might get annoying, but many are
>>>>>>> willing
>>>>>>> to learn and it could work out. As for good dating sites ... why
>>>>>>> not
>>>>>>> just getting onto the social networks like Facebook and put your
>>>>>>> status as single? Maybe attend some of the singles conferences
>>>>>>> that
>>>>>>> are out there? And if someone interests you, then go after them
>>>>>>> (whether online or not).
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Anyway, talk to you later and peace. May you have much luck with
>>>>>>> your
>>>>>>> dating search.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Nimer J
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On 22.03.2012, Joshua Lester <jlester8462 at students.pccua.edu>
>>>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>>> Also, it has been proven, that there are people on chat sites,
>>>>>>> that
>>>>>>> pretend to be something, to get your attention, and then when
>>>>>>> you meet
>>>>>>> them, they're a criminal.
>>>>>>> Be careful, and meet people one on one, and in person.
>>>>>>> Come to the NFB convention, and you might meet someone, and oh
>>>>>>> yes,
>>>>>>> there are sighted members in the NFB, as well!
>>>>>>> Blessings, Joshua
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On 3/22/12, Gloria G <gloria.graves at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> Hi,
>>>>>>> I have never gone on to any of the online dating sites, but I
>>>>>>> would be
>>>>>>> very
>>>>>>> careful because a person online is not as friendly or charming
>>>>>>> as they
>>>>>>> appear to be over emails. I have dated very few blind people and
>>>>>>> find
>>>>>>> that
>>>>>>> there is always a focus on blindness in the relationship and I
>>>>>>> feel
>>>>>>> that
>>>>>>> is
>>>>>>> a negative thing at times because we all live with blindness on
>>>>>>> a
>>>>>>> daily
>>>>>>> basis and want to know we are more than our blindness. I have
>>>>>>> found
>>>>>>> there
>>>>>>> are a lot of people open to dating a blind person especially
>>>>>>> when they
>>>>>>> are
>>>>>>> confident and out going. I have been in a relationship with a
>>>>>>> sited
>>>>>>> person
>>>>>>> for 3 years and things are wonderful.
>>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>>> From: "Robin" <robinmel71 at earthlink.net
>>>>>>> To: <nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>>>>>>> Sent: Thursday, March 22, 2012 4:47 PM
>>>>>>> Subject: [nabs-l] Dating & Sighted-Blind-Low Vision
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Hello to everyone,
>>>>>>> I am just wondering if anyone has had any experience with online
>>>>>>> dating
>>>>>>> and if so what sites would you recommend? What experiences have
>>>>>>> you
>>>>>>> had
>>>>>>> with dating sighted people vs dating blind people? I look
>>>>>>> forward to
>>>>>>> hearing your stories.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> I seldom think about my limitations, and they never make me sad.
>>>>>>> Perhaps
>>>>>>> there is just a touch of yearning at times; but it is vague,
>>>>>>> like a
>>>>>>> breeze
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> among flowers.
>>>>>>> Hellen Keller
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>> nabs-l mailing list
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>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>> nabs-l mailing list
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>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>> nabs-l mailing list
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>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> --
>>>>>>> Nimer Jaber, ICł and Freedom Scientific JAWS Certifications
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> The message above is intended for the recipient to whom it was
>>>>>>> addressed. If you believe that you are not the intended
>>>>>>> recipient,
>>>>>>> please notify me via reply email and destroy all copies of this
>>>>>>> correspondence. Action taken as a result of this email or its
>>>>>>> contents
>>>>>>> by anyone other than the intended recipient may result in civil
>>>>>>> or
>>>>>>> criminal action. I have checked this email and all corresponding
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>>>>>>> machine is
>>>>>>> up to you. Thanks.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Registered Linux User 529141.
>>>>>>> http://counter.li.org/
>>>>>>> Vinux testing and documentation coordinator
>>>>>>> To get more information about a free and accessible operating
>>>>>>> system,
>>>>>>> please click here:
>>>>>>> http://www.vinuxproject.org
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> To find out about a free and versatile screen reader for windows
>>>>>>> XP
>>>>>>> and above, please click here:
>>>>>>> http://www.nvda-project.org
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> You can follow @nimerjaber on Twitter for the latest technology
>>>>>>> news.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Check out my blog related to technology by clicking here:
>>>>>>> http://nimertech.blogspot.com
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> To contact me, you can reply to this email or you may call me at
>>>>>>> (720)
>>>>>>> (251-4530) and I will do my best to respond to you promptly.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> --
>>>>>>> Nimer Jaber, ICł and Freedom Scientific JAWS Certifications
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> The message above is intended for the recipient to whom it was
>>>>>>> addressed. If you believe that you are not the intended
>>>>>>> recipient,
>>>>>>> please notify me via reply email and destroy all copies of this
>>>>>>> correspondence. Action taken as a result of this email or its
>>>>>>> contents
>>>>>>> by anyone other than the intended recipient may result in civil
>>>>>>> or
>>>>>>> criminal action. I have checked this email and all corresponding
>>>>>>> attachments for security threats. However, security of your
>>>>>>> machine is
>>>>>>> up to you. Thanks.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Registered Linux User 529141.
>>>>>>> http://counter.li.org/
>>>>>>> Vinux testing and documentation coordinator
>>>>>>> To get more information about a free and accessible operating
>>>>>>> system,
>>>>>>> please click here:
>>>>>>> http://www.vinuxproject.org
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> To find out about a free and versatile screen reader for windows
>>>>>>> XP
>>>>>>> and above, please click here:
>>>>>>> http://www.nvda-project.org
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> You can follow @nimerjaber on Twitter for the latest technology
>>>>>>> news.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Check out my blog related to technology by clicking here:
>>>>>>> http://nimertech.blogspot.com
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> To contact me, you can reply to this email or you may call me at
>>>>>>> (720)
>>>>>>> (251-4530) and I will do my best to respond to you promptly.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>>> nabs-l mailing list
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>>>>>>>
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>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> --
>>>>>> 73
>>>>>> kd8qiq
>>>>>> jeff crouch
>>>>>>
>>>>>> _______________________________________________
>>>>>> nabs-l mailing list
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>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>
>>
>> --
>> 73
>> kd8qiq
>> jeff crouch
>>
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