[nabs-l] family's misunderstandings of the real world

Thu Nov 21 02:49:59 UTC 2013

Ok I will write you off list

Lavar J phillips
5003 48 Street Woodside New York 11377
Cell # (917) 858 3368
Twitter lavar1988
On Nov 20, 2013 8:52 PM, "Beth Taurasi" <denverqueen1107 at comcast.net> wrote:

> Yes, they think I don't think clearly. Well, if worse came to worse, my bf
> Blake said he'd offer his home to me as a refuge for any sort of attempted
> injustice on my family's part.  I might have to block some people on my FB
> page, block some Twitter people, and so on.  I will have to make sure that
> the privacy settings on Facebook are set to friends only. That's all.
> Anyway, you are welcome to call me sometime tomorrow or you can skype me.
> My contact info will be at the bottom of this email.
> Beth Taurasi
> NFBCO
> Denver Chapter
> denverqueen0920 Skype
> 720-435-7407 CellOn 11/20/2013 6:16 PM, Lavar Phillips wrote:
>
>> Okay so they think your not thinking clearly.
>> Lavar J Phillips
>> 5003 48 Street Woodside New York 11377
>> Cell # (917) 858 3368
>> Twitter lavar1988
>> On Nov 20, 2013 8:07 PM, "Beth Taurasi" <denverqueen1107 at comcast.net>
>> wrote:
>>
>>  They think it's because of mental health issues, but they are not seeing
>>> the big picture.  They are to blame for the mental health issues, and
>>> they
>>> didn't allow me as a teenager to have a boyfriend, to go to prom, to have
>>> friends period.  They simply isolated me from different clubs, youth
>>> groups, and such simply because I had suicidal ideations.  There's too
>>> much
>>> to cover in one email, and I wanna make it short.
>>> Beth Taurasi
>>> On 11/20/2013 5:48 PM, Lavar Phillips wrote:
>>>
>>>  In what way is your family saying you are obsessed with boys ? Have you
>>>> not
>>>> been with your boyfriend for a long time.?Are they telling you to give
>>>> it
>>>> time to see if you want kids with him? I understand wanting to be able
>>>> to
>>>> have a healthy family. My girlfriend is 27 years old as well and I want
>>>> kids I love kids
>>>> Also your family can't take your freedom away. Sometime family can be a
>>>> pain I'm sorry
>>>>
>>>> Lavar J Phillips
>>>> 5003 48 Street Woodside New York 11377
>>>> Cell # (917) 858 3368
>>>> Twitter lavar1988
>>>> On Nov 20, 2013 7:27 PM, "Beth Taurasi" <denverqueen1107 at comcast.net>
>>>> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>   I faced problems in Florida, and no, I won't take my cousin's advice
>>>> to
>>>>
>>>>> any mind, Arielle.  She doesn't understand any of what I would have
>>>>> said
>>>>> in
>>>>> this message.  I'm glad you at least had some say in your life as to
>>>>> whom
>>>>> you should marry, but my cousins and family are saying I am obsessed
>>>>> with
>>>>> boys and don't give it time.  Well, I'm 27 and don't have any kids yet,
>>>>> and
>>>>> I really want to have healthy pregnancies like everyone else and not at
>>>>> 35
>>>>> or older.  I'd like to be able to marry as young as I can, but 35 is an
>>>>> unacceptable age to be pregnant, and Blake's a bit younger anyway, so
>>>>> we
>>>>> have to gauge how much time we have left before there's complications
>>>>> due
>>>>> to age and stuff.  My family doesn't really want me to do it because
>>>>> they're fleshly and require fleshly things.  Blake and I are devout
>>>>> Christians, and don't believe so much that the all important job should
>>>>> be
>>>>> first before marriage.  I gained a lot of freedom by coming to Denver,
>>>>> and
>>>>> I'm afraid it will be ripped away because of whatever reason. It's so
>>>>> sad
>>>>> what families often think of us, as their pets, not full members of the
>>>>> family.
>>>>> Beth On 11/20/2013 3:48 PM, Arielle Silverman wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>   Hi Beth and  all,
>>>>>
>>>>>> The phrase "real world" has always bothered me, in  a similar fashion
>>>>>> as the word "normal". I'm not sure what the one "real world" is
>>>>>> supposed to be, but in my observation it seems that everyone's reality
>>>>>> is a little different. I would submit that people are living in the
>>>>>> real world whether they are adolescents living with their parents,
>>>>>> college students not yet paying their own bills, people paying their
>>>>>> bills through SSI, or working people. Your cousin's implication that
>>>>>> the "real world" is one dominated by sighted people is something I
>>>>>> find particularly offensive. I would consider people working in  the
>>>>>> blindness field, or married to blind people, as still living in
>>>>>> reality.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I have dated both blind and sighted people. My husband is sighted, but
>>>>>> I didn't marry him because I was specifically looking for a sighted
>>>>>> husband; I married him because I fell in love with him and he fell in
>>>>>> love with me even though I am blind. My parents never told me outright
>>>>>> that I should marry a sighted person, but they did send me that
>>>>>> message indirectly by being less enthusiastic about my blind
>>>>>> boyfriends than about my sighted one. It is sad, but many of our
>>>>>> family members just don't understand what blind partners have to offer
>>>>>> us. I don't think you should give your cousin's advice in that area
>>>>>> much mind. Anyone who has not met your boyfriend, blind or sighted, is
>>>>>> not qualified to judge him in my opinion.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I'm not sure what your family members think you will gain by moving
>>>>>> back to Florida, but it sounds like they don't quite understand what
>>>>>> you have in Denver or what problems you faced in Florida. Again, it is
>>>>>> your decision, not theirs.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Best,
>>>>>> Arielle
>>>>>>
>>>>>> On 11/20/13, justin williams <justin.williams2 at gmail.com> wrote:
>>>>>>
>>>>>>   Beth, do your thing.  I don't know whether you should or shouldn't
>>>>>> date
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> man, but if you like him, then enjoy the moment and see where it
>>>>>>> takes
>>>>>>> you.
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>>> From: nabs-l [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Beth
>>>>>>> Taurasi
>>>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, November 20, 2013 11:01 AM
>>>>>>> To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
>>>>>>> Subject: [nabs-l] family's misunderstandings of the real world
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Hi, all.
>>>>>>> I was recently Facebook chatting my cousin and she accused me of
>>>>>>> doing
>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>> following things:
>>>>>>> 1. Obsession with my latest boyfriend, who she might have a problem
>>>>>>> with
>>>>>>> because he is blind.
>>>>>>> 2. She said I should be open to dating sighted people, yes, Arielle,
>>>>>>> you
>>>>>>> are
>>>>>>> married to a sighted man, but not all sighted people like a blind
>>>>>>> woman,
>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>> statistically it isn't true that sighted people will go out with
>>>>>>> blind
>>>>>>> women.
>>>>>>> 3. She says that blind people can do things, but she says I don't
>>>>>>> understand
>>>>>>> the real world.  What? I told her I do understand the real world, I
>>>>>>> pay
>>>>>>> my
>>>>>>> bills, I save money, I work with money. I don't pay taxes because in
>>>>>>> my
>>>>>>> understanding of the so-called "real world", SSI is not taxable, and
>>>>>>> finding
>>>>>>> a job for me is hard because I am dually disabled.
>>>>>>> I need help also convincing her that parenting is possible even with
>>>>>>> my
>>>>>>> particular disabilities.  I've tried referring her to NFB's parenting
>>>>>>> without Sight thingies, and she doesn't seem interested. I have a lot
>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>> friends on here so I'm posing this question.  Also, she says I should
>>>>>>> move
>>>>>>> back to Florida, but after all this stuff I've been through back
>>>>>>> there, I
>>>>>>> said to her, "No.  I've got all I need in Denver."
>>>>>>> Please help.
>>>>>>> Beth
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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>>>>>>> .com
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
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>>>>>> denverqueen1107%40comcast.net
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>   _______________________________________________
>>>>>>
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>>>>> lavarjphillips%40gmail.com
>>>>>
>>>>>   _______________________________________________
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