[nabs-l] Families misunderstanding real world

[Bridgit Pollpeter]

Beth,

First, many, many women have children after 35. Technically, it gets
more and more difficult to have children after 30 just because women are
born with so many eggs that do not remain our entire life, but, if
you're healthy, there's no reason to think you can't have children after
30. I had my first child at 31, and I'm type one diabetic. I have
friends much older than me who had their first child well after 35. So
this isn't a reason to rush children, or think you can't after a certain
age.

Also, the urgency to marry and have children shouldn't lead your
relationship. Just let life happen. If you and your partner are ready
for this, then do it. But at 27, honey , no one has a say in your
choices but you. If you really love this person and see a future, move
forward; not because you think you're reaching a sell-by-date and need
to marry and have children by a certain time, but because you truly want
to and are ready, and you have met the right person to do these things
with.

No one should dictate your choices. Beth, you say it's your life, your
choices, but your actions indicate you are giving too much weight to
what your family thinks and says. Again, at 27, you're a grown up and
can make your own choices. Seeking advice and wisdom is great, but
ultimately, you need to do what is right for you.

If you're seeking a relationship just because you think you need to mate
by your 30's, then maybe your family has a point, but if you really love
this guy and want to be with him, then no one can stop you.

So don't let people, or your own self-inflicted timeline dictate your
life. Things truly happen when they are suppose too.

Bridgit
Message: 2
Date: Wed, 20 Nov 2013 17:26:29 -0700
From: Beth Taurasi <denverqueen1107 at comcast.net>
To: National Association of Blind Students mailing list
	<nabs-l at nfbnet.org>
Subject: Re: [nabs-l] family's misunderstandings of the real world
Message-ID: <528D5335.3000706 at comcast.net>
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1; format=flowed

I faced problems in Florida, and no, I won't take my cousin's advice to 
any mind, Arielle.  She doesn't understand any of what I would have said

in this message.  I'm glad you at least had some say in your life as to 
whom you should marry, but my cousins and family are saying I am 
obsessed with boys and don't give it time.  Well, I'm 27 and don't have 
any kids yet, and I really want to have healthy pregnancies like 
everyone else and not at 35 or older.  I'd like to be able to marry as 
young as I can, but 35 is an unacceptable age to be pregnant, and 
Blake's a bit younger anyway, so we have to gauge how much time we have 
left before there's complications due to age and stuff.  My family 
doesn't really want me to do it because they're fleshly and require 
fleshly things.  Blake and I are devout Christians, and don't believe so

much that the all important job should be first before marriage.  I 
gained a lot of freedom by coming to Denver, and I'm afraid it will be 
ripped away because of whatever reason. It's so sad what families often 
think of us, as their pets, not full members of the family. Beth On
11/20/2013 3:48 PM,