[nabs-l] social strategies at parties

Tue Jan 6 03:33:18 UTC 2015

Hi Vejas, Large parties can be challenging, but here are a few tricks
I've learned over the years. I try to arrive on time or not too late
into the party, so the group is still small. If you arrive early on,
it'll be easier to get into the middle of the group and learn who is
there and the lay of the land before things get too crowded. Also, at
many large parties there is a smaller sub-gathering of people around
the edges where it may be easier to find and talk to people. For
example, at a house party most of the action might be in the kitchen
or living room, but there might be a few people hanging out in the
back yard or another common room. I like to find these smaller
gathering places and wander over there if I am on noise overload or
just want to be in a smaller group setting. I think it is fine to
locate someone who is getting food and ask him or her what is
available. If people are sitting down and I can't find people I know,
I might go up to a table or group of chairs and ask if there is an
empty seat, then if there is one, sit down and try to start a
conversation with the others or join one in progress. The only thing I
wouldn't recommend would be asking one person to stay with you all
night, unless you ar good friends, or asking someone who is not eating
to get up and get you food. In general, I did find that after high
school was over, peers are a lot friendlier and more willing to let
you mingle with them. I hope these suggestions help.
Arielle

On 1/5/15, justin williams via nabs-l <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
> I don't like the sitting with me part unless you build a relationship with
> them first or they offer, but asking about the food is a good idea.  Also,
> eat before you go so it is not necessary that you eat when you are there.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: nabs-l [mailto:nabs-l-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Aleeha Dudley
> via nabs-l
> Sent: Monday, January 05, 2015 8:42 PM
> To: Vejas Vasiliauskas; National Association of Blind Students mailing list
> Subject: Re: [nabs-l] social strategies at parties
>
> I think both of these are fine and are also great conversation starters.
> Just try to get to know the person. If they are willing to help, odds are
> they are also going to be willing to talk as well. If they don’t want to
> help, they’re not worth hanging out with anyway.
> JMT.
>
> Aleeha Dudley and Seeing Eye Dog Dallas Vice President, Ohio Association of
> Guide Dog Users Vice President, Ohio Association of Blind Students Both
> proud divisions of the National Federation of the Blind of Ohio
> Email: blindcowgirl1993 at gmail.com <mailto:blindcowgirl1993 at gmail.com>
> The National Federation of the Blind knows that blindness is not the
> characteristic that defines you or your future. Every day we raise the
> expectations of blind people, because low expectations create obstacles
> between blind people and our dreams. You can live the life you want;
> blindness is not what holds you back.
> “The wind of heaven is that which blows between a horse’s ears.” - Arabian
> proverb
>
>> On Jan 5, 2015, at 8:37 PM, Vejas Vasiliauskas via nabs-l
>> <nabs-l at nfbnet.org> wrote:
>>
>> Hi All,
>> I'd really appreciate some advice.  I would really like to know what you
>> do in big gatherings where you hardly know anyone.
>> Two weeks ago I went to a friend's house because she was sponsoring an
>> event where people could go up and share their writing.  There were about
>> 100 people there, mostly from my high school.  I only knew about 3 of
>> them.  I would normally have hung out with my friend (I prefer to hang out
>> with an individual rather than a group), but since it was at her house
>> last month, she had to tend to all the guests and make sure they had
>> everything they needed.  At dinner we had pizza and other snacks.  I found
>> the kitchen easily because I heard people going in there, but I didn't
>> know exactly where all the food was.  I asked someone where the pizza was
>> and he got me a slice.  Then awhile later someone mentioned more food and
>> I had had no idea that there was any.
>> So my questions are:
>> 1.  Is it okay to ask someone what all the food options are even if you
>> hardly know them? Do you think that they would normally be willing to tell
>> me?
>> 2.  Can I ask that person to sit with me if I don't have anyone to hang
>> out with, or do you think that's too akward?
>> In the end everything turned out fine, but I'm just trying to get ideas so
>> that I can feel more comfortable in future parties.
>> I have the feeling that a lot of times people want to help but don't
>> because they don't know what to do.
>> Thanks,
>> Vejas
>>
>> _______________________________________________
>> nabs-l mailing list
>> nabs-l at nfbnet.org
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nabs-l_nfbnet.org
>> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
>> nabs-l:
>> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nabs-l_nfbnet.org/blindcowgirl1993%4
>> 0gmail.com
>
> _______________________________________________
> nabs-l mailing list
> nabs-l at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nabs-l_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> nabs-l:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nabs-l_nfbnet.org/justin.williams2%40gmail.com
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> nabs-l mailing list
> nabs-l at nfbnet.org
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/listinfo/nabs-l_nfbnet.org
> To unsubscribe, change your list options or get your account info for
> nabs-l:
> http://nfbnet.org/mailman/options/nabs-l_nfbnet.org/arielle71%40gmail.com
>