[nagdu] "Starting a Dialogue?

Marion Gwizdala blind411 at verizon.net
Thu May 13 11:52:08 UTC 2010


Cheryl,
    In my opinion, even if the pastor was making a joke, Kathryn felt 
offended by it. Jokes founded in stereotypes are in poor taste and are not 
funny. Kathryn felt publicly humiliated by her Spiritual leader. His example 
as such a leader not only reinforces the stereotypes many hold about 
blindness, they also lend approval to others who hear such comments to make 
similar distasteful jokes! I am of the opinion that public humiliation 
deserves a public apology.
    This can be done in a way that creates a positive outcome for Kathryn, 
in particular, and the blind, in general. The Master Teacher taught us that 
"Those who humble themselves shall be exalted!" Though this sounds like a 
paradox, it is a social phenomenon that is very true. When someone humbles 
themselves by making a sincere apology, those who hear their apology see 
that person as a stronger, more credible individual.I once mentioned 
recently what is called a "teachable moment". this is one of them!

Fraternally yours,
Marion Gwizdala



----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Cheryl Osborn" <chapalacheryl at gmail.com>
To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users" 
<nagdu at nfbnet.org>
Sent: Wednesday, May 12, 2010 7:25 PM
Subject: Re: [nagdu] "Starting a Dialogue?


> Hi Cathryn,
>
> Are you sure that your pastor wasn't just making a joke?  As for
> people in general,  they can be very patronizing with their comments
> without realizing it.  It's up to you to let them know what you are
> capable of.  If blind people came with a set of instructions, we would
> all have to do everything the same way. <grin>
>
>
> On 5/12/10, Cathryn Bonnette <cathrynisfinally at verizon.net> wrote:
>> All:
>>
>> I am very interested in this discussion since recently my pastor remarked
>> from the pulpit that congregation members had helped me with moving, and
>> "every box we moved she fell over." Actually, I had not fallen over 
>> anything
>> the entire day, and I definitely regretted my risk in asking for 
>> assistance
>> from church members when I had several other sources available.  The
>> perception seems to be that I am amazing if I can walk down the street
>> without falling, and similar evaluations of my "inspiring" capabilities. 
>> Am
>> I crazy, or is this type of comment demeaning and offensive??? The folks
>> making comments seem to believe they are being encouraging and 
>> appropriate.
>> I will confront this issue with this pastor- probably tomorrow evening 
>> when
>> we generally talk by telephone. I would be most appreciative of thoughts,
>> ideas, suggestions from this group since I am relatively new at dealing 
>> with
>> this issue- becoming blind late in 2005.
>>
>> Thanks in advance for any comments etc. you may be able to provide.
>>
>> Cathryn (& Abby)
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On 
>> Behalf
>> Of Marion Gwizdala
>> Sent: Wednesday, May 12, 2010 11:44 AM
>> To: NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>> Subject: [nagdu] "Starting a Dialogue?
>>
>> Dear All,
>>     I fully appreciate the sentiment that "starting a dialogue" is a far
>> better approach to this issue than protesting it. As for the Foundation
>> Fighting Blindness, I have written to them on a number of occasions to 
>> share
>>
>> how their view of blindness and the information they disseminate does 
>> more
>> harm than good to the blind. I also know that, in the case of FFB, some 
>> of
>> their very involved blind volunteers have also shared their concerns 
>> about
>> the approach they employ to no avail.
>>     In addition to FFB, I have also expressed my concerns to other
>> organizations that employ the fear factor in raising funds and 
>> "awareness"
>> (please notice quotes, as it is not, IMO), including some of the 
>> Lighthouses
>>
>> for the Blind and Prevent Blindness. Their tactics, however, are very
>> fruitful for them, helping raise their much-needed revenue. Furthermore,
>> they have the support of those in the blind community who feel indebted 
>> to
>> them for the help they have received, as well as those who have a 
>> negative
>> view of blindness and cannot see the proverbial "forest through the 
>> trees",
>> as they generally enjoy the coddling, having been taught by these
>> organizations that this is the best they can expect of themselves and 
>> should
>>
>> accept the good will of the public who, after all, "are only trying to
>> help"! This brings up another applicable proverb: "The road to hell is 
>> paved
>>
>> with good intentions!"
>>     "Starting a dialogue" implies that one has not yet been attempted. 
>> Not
>> only has it been attempted, the NFB has published information that I have
>> shared on this list concerning the dangers of simulation exercises such 
>> as
>> "Dining in the Dark". Furthermore, as I have also stated on this list, 
>> the
>> few people who pay $100+ per plate to eat in the dark are not the only 
>> ones
>> impacted by this inaccurate portrayal of the incapacity of the blind. 
>> When
>> news releases are circulated by these "experts on blindness" (again, see
>> quotes, as they are not!), the media accepts the stereotypes and reports 
>> on
>> them, not only by reporting on the event, but by believing such 
>> inaccuracies
>>
>> as our compensatory abilities and heightened senses, using such
>> misconceptions in future reporting!
>>     Whether discrimination is founded in hatred or in pity, it is founded 
>> in
>>
>> the same underlying ignorance. If we are to be seen as equals, we must be
>> treated as equals. differential treatment founded in the pitifulness
>> simulation exercises promote do nothing to bring us to the point of
>> equality. Rather, it relegates us to a second-class status in which we 
>> are
>> seen as needy! This results in many people seeing me, no matter how
>> successful I may be, and saying "There but for the grace of God go I!" 
>> They
>> are really saying, "Oh, poor man! I am glad I am not like him!" They have 
>> no
>>
>> clue how full and wonderful my life is and, most likely, imagine it to be
>> very depressing! After all, "If I were blind, I would kill myself!" How 
>> many
>>
>> times have we all heard this? I, personally, would rather be blind than
>> dead! JMHO!
>>
>> Fraternally yours,
>> Marion
>>
>>
>>
>> ----- Original Message -----
>> From: "Albert J Rizzi" <albert at myblindspot.org>
>> To: "'NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>> Sent: Tuesday, May 11, 2010 2:13 PM
>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>
>>
>>> And isn't starting a dialogue a great thing and a good step toward
>>> dispelling misperceptions about our abilities
>>>
>>> Albert J. Rizzi, M.Ed.
>>> CEO/Founder
>>> My Blind Spot, Inc.
>>> 90 Broad Street - 18th Fl.
>>> New York, New York  10004
>>> www.myblindspot.org
>>> PH: 917-553-0347
>>> Fax: 212-858-5759
>>> "The person who says it cannot be done, shouldn't interrupt the one who 
>>> is
>>> doing it."
>>>
>>>
>>> Visit us on Facebook LinkedIn
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On 
>>> Behalf
>>> Of Linda Gwizdak
>>> Sent: Tuesday, May 11, 2010 12:55 PM
>>> To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>
>>> Hey Margo,
>>> Look at it this way - the waitors are all real blind people.  Yes, the
>>> sighted diners are bumbling around but they do see how efficient the
>>> genuine
>>>
>>> blind waitors are in serving them!
>>>
>>> It's all just a gimmick that can start a real dialog on blindness.
>>>
>>> Lyn and Landon
>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>> From: "Margo and Arrow" <margo.downey at verizon.net>
>>> To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>> Sent: Sunday, May 09, 2010 1:40 PM
>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>
>>>
>>>> but while they are in the experience, they must think we're so helpless
>>>> because they're blundering about trying to figure out how to dine while
>>>> blindfolded.  I do not like blindness simulations at all.  Makes us 
>>>> look
>>>> helpless.
>>>>
>>>> margo and arrow
>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>> From: "Linda Gwizdak" <linda.gwizdak at cox.net>
>>>> To: "NAGDU Mailing List, the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
>>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>> Sent: Sunday, May 09, 2010 12:31 PM
>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>> Hi,
>>>>> I never went to a "Dining in the Dark" event - too expensive! But, I
>>>>> know
>>>
>>>>> some people who worked for it a few years ago here in San diego.  I
>>>>> don't
>>>
>>>>> think it is around anymore as those people have moved on to other 
>>>>> jobs.
>>>>> They never said that the "Dining in the Dark" was bad towards 
>>>>> blindness.
>>>>> After all, everyone had fun and had the knowledge that the blindfold
>>>>> come
>>>
>>>>> off or the lights get turned on and they go off to live their sighted
>>>>> lives. I see this as a gimmick to fundraise with and I have no problem
>>>>> with it. I see no harm in it.  the people know that the waitors are 
>>>>> all
>>>>> really blind and that is something positive.
>>>>>
>>>>> As far as a "realistic" experinece for sighted people, I think it is 
>>>>> the
>>>>> same as doing a "White Cane Safety Day" and having people don 
>>>>> blindfolds
>>>>> to walk with a cane. It makes people aware that they actually have 
>>>>> other
>>>>> senses other than sight that really do influence their movement in the
>>>>> envirnment.
>>>>>
>>>>> It probably is like a person who is newly blind and hasn't learned any
>>>>> skills yet.
>>>>>
>>>>> Happy Mother's Day to all you Moms out there in NAGDU-land!
>>>>>
>>>>> Lyn and Landon
>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>> From: "Albert J Rizzi" <albert at myblindspot.org>
>>>>> To: "'NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users'"
>>>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>>> Sent: Saturday, May 08, 2010 10:07 AM
>>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>>I am curious, as we seem to find fault in the dining in the dark
>>>>>>experience
>>>>>> has any one of us attended one of these events to find out first hand
>>>>>> how
>>>>>> blindness is presented at these events? I recall the response to
>>>>>> letters
>>>>>> sent to Florida highlighting the sensory appreciation of food devoid 
>>>>>> of
>>>>>> sight influencing one's taste or preference over what to try and or 
>>>>>> not
>>>>>> try.
>>>>>> It would be interesting   to here from someone with first hand
>>>>>> experience
>>>>>> with attendance at one of these events.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Albert J. Rizzi, M.Ed.
>>>>>> CEO/Founder
>>>>>> My Blind Spot, Inc.
>>>>>> 90 Broad Street - 18th Fl.
>>>>>> New York, New York  10004
>>>>>> www.myblindspot.org
>>>>>> PH: 917-553-0347
>>>>>> Fax: 212-858-5759
>>>>>> "The person who says it cannot be done, shouldn't interrupt the one 
>>>>>> who
>>>>>> is
>>>>>> doing it."
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Visit us on Facebook LinkedIn
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> -----Original Message-----
>>>>>> From: nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org [mailto:nagdu-bounces at nfbnet.org] On
>>>>>> Behalf
>>>>>> Of Julie J
>>>>>> Sent: Saturday, May 08, 2010 12:28 PM
>>>>>> To: NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users
>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>>>
>>>>>> The article says it was established in 2008.  I suppose that is in
>>>>>> reference
>>>>>>
>>>>>> to the US school, since the one in Canada has been around for a 
>>>>>> while.
>>>>>> That's pretty recent and could be why no one has heard of it before.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> I think the whole concept of "Dining in the Dark" is not very
>>>>>> productive
>>>
>>>>>> in
>>>>>> the long run.  Helpful in raising funds, yes, but pretty low in any
>>>>>> meaningful understanding of blindness.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> JMHO
>>>>>> Julie
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> ----- Original Message -----
>>>>>> From: "Buddy Brannan" <buddy at brannan.name>
>>>>>> To: "NAGDU Mailing List,the National Association of Guide Dog Users"
>>>>>> <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>>>> Sent: Friday, May 07, 2010 9:06 PM
>>>>>> Subject: Re: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Why haven't we heard of who? Mira or the Carolina Eye thingy? Mira 
>>>>>>> has
>>>>>>> been around a while, but I didn't know they were expanded into the 
>>>>>>> US;
>>>>>>> Mira is a guide dog school in Quebec. (They teach their guide dogs
>>>>>>> French.)
>>>>>>> --
>>>>>>> Buddy Brannan, KB5ELV - Erie, PA
>>>>>>> Phone: (814) 860-3194 or 888-75-BUDDY
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>> On May 7, 2010, at 7:03 PM, Margo and Arrow wrote:
>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> got problems with this--dining in the dark and why haven't we heard
>>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>>> them before?
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> Margo and Arrow
>>>>>>>> ----- Original Message ----- From: "Toni Eames"
>>>>>>>> <eeames at csufresno.edu>
>>>>>>>> To: <gdui-friends at yahoogroups.com>; <nagdu at nfbnet.org>
>>>>>>>> Sent: Wednesday, May 05, 2010 12:57 PM
>>>>>>>> Subject: [nagdu] Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Carolina Eye Partners With Mira Foundation
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Wednesday, May 5, 2010
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>
>> <http://www.thepilot.com/news/2010/may/05/carolina-eye-partners-mira-foundat
>>>>>>
>>>
>> ion/>http://www.thepilot.com/news/2010/may/05/carolina-eye-partners-mira-fou
>>>>>> ndation/
>>>>>>>>> Mira Foundation USA, a nonprofit dedicated to providing guide dogs
>>>>>>>>> to
>>>>>>>>> children in need, announces Carolina Eye Associates as one of the
>>>>>>>>> organization's founding corporate partners.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Mira USA is the only nonprofit providing guide dogs to visually
>>>>>>>>> impaired
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> young children in the United States. The two organizations both
>>>>>>>>> share
>>>>>>>>> the same concern and commitment to providing young children with 
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> resources - and companions - that enable personal independence and
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> freedom of mobility.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Carolina Eye is also the headline sponsor of Mira USA's upcoming
>>>>>>>>> "Dining
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> in the Dark" fundraiser event taking place May 14 at the Country
>>>>>>>>> Club
>>>
>>>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> North Carolina in Pinehurst.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> "Mira USA is an organization close to all our hearts, and we 
>>>>>>>>> admire
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> passion with which they've tackled the huge job of providing these
>>>>>>>>> specially trained guide dogs to young children across our 
>>>>>>>>> country,"
>>>>>>>>> said
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Dr. Greg Mincey, of Carolina Eye Associates. "We are proud to be a
>>>>>>>>> part
>>>>>>>>> of Mira USA's mission for improving the lives of children in need 
>>>>>>>>> of
>>>>>>>>> a
>>>>>>>>> guide dog and invite other companies and organizations nationwide 
>>>>>>>>> to
>>>>>>>>> join us in supporting their effort."
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> "Dining in the Dark" is one of many community activities held to
>>>>>>>>> raise
>>>>>>>>> awareness and funds to support the work of Mira USA. The concept
>>>>>>>>> began
>>>>>>>>> in Germany and has spread to cities where restaurants offer a 
>>>>>>>>> unique
>>>>>>>>> twist on a normal dinner out: guests gather to wine and dine in
>>>>>>>>> darkness. With the complete loss of vision - and the resulting
>>>>>>>>> heightening of the other four senses - Dining in the Dark will be 
>>>>>>>>> an
>>>>>>>>> extraordinary adventure.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> "This is the first time such an event has been presented in North
>>>>>>>>> Carolina," said a spokesman. "Reserved seats are filling quickly 
>>>>>>>>> for
>>>>>>>>> this dinner as the community has embraced both the novelty of the
>>>>>>>>> event
>>>>>>>>> and the mission of Mira USA."
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> "We are grateful to have the support of the distinguished team at
>>>>>>>>> Carolina Eye Associates," said Robert Baillie, Mira USA founder 
>>>>>>>>> and
>>>>>>>>> chairman. "There are over 57,000 visually impaired young children 
>>>>>>>>> in
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> United States and ours is a big undertaking to begin to serve this
>>>>>>>>> largely overlooked population by providing specially trained 
>>>>>>>>> service
>>>>>>>>> dogs. I've experienced how the dog can provide a bridge between 
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> child and the community, diminishing the stigma often associated
>>>>>>>>> with
>>>>>>>>> disabilities, and with the support of the public and organizations
>>>>>>>>> like
>>>>>>>>> Carolina Eye, we will give as many children as possible this
>>>>>>>>> tremendous
>>>>>>>>> gift of independence and companionship."
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> MIRA Foundation USA Inc. is dedicated to enriching the lives of 
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> largely overlooked population of young children living with
>>>>>>>>> disabilities
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> by providing specially trained service dogs. Mira USA was
>>>>>>>>> established
>>>
>>>>>>>>> in
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> 2008 by Robert Baillie. Having suddenly lost his sight and 
>>>>>>>>> realizing
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> life-changing difference his guide dog Devon made for him, Bob set
>>>>>>>>> out
>>>>>>>>> to improve the experience of individuals living with blindness.
>>>>>>>>> These
>>>>>>>>> special dogs and services are given to children free of charge.
>>>>>>>>> Although
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Mira USA will provide dogs to all who qualify, its main focus is 
>>>>>>>>> on
>>>>>>>>> children 11 years of age and above. Mira USA believes everyone
>>>>>>>>> should
>>>>>>>>> have access to the tools and resources that enable personal
>>>>>>>>> independence
>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> and freedom of mobility, and invites you to be a part of it. Learn
>>>>>>>>> more
>>>>>>>>> at <http://www.mirausa.org>www.mirausa.org or (910) 944-7757.
>>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>> Carolina Eye Associates is one of the largest eye-care practices 
>>>>>>>>> in
>>>>>>>>> the
>>>>>>>>> Southeast, with eight regional eye-care centers in North and South
>>>>>>>>> Carolina. Carolina Eye was established in 1977 in 
>>>>>>>>> Pinehurst/Southern
>>>>>>>>> Pines, N.C., by Dr. Robert Gale Martin and Dr. George Tate Jr. 
>>>>>>>>> Since
>>>>>>>>> then, patients from across the United States and more than 20
>>>>>>>>> foreign
>>>>>>>>> countries have come to Carolina Eye for eye care needs. For more
>>>>>>>>> information, please visit
>>>>>>>>> <http://www.carolinaeye.com>www.carolinaeye.com.
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>>
>>>>>>>> _______________________________________________
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