[stylist] new poem

[Jacqueline Williams]

Kyle,
This poem uses "personification," which has been looked upon as  a "no-no"
by poets for some time. I do not agree. Perhaps because I am guilty of using
it myself. I love to get inside of inanimate objects and think of something
alive and feeling.
The other comment is that I do not think that you have two long and unwieldy
lines. I think that if you made an attachment, this would be resolved. It
seems to me that those two lines have a natural separation point, and your
e-mail used its own formatting. A problem that we all have, except, it
appears, Barbara's. I do not know how she sends hers, but you might ask.
If that does not give you the right line length and rhythm and rhyme, I
agree with the other comments.
Jackie

-----Original Message-----
From: stylist [mailto:stylist-bounces at nfbnet.org] On Behalf Of Kyle woodard
Sent: Tuesday, March 26, 2013 6:22 PM
To: Writer's Division Mailing List
Subject: [stylist] new poem

Hello, here is a new poem I just wrote that I wanted to share and get some
feedback on, if you wouldn't mind. It is tentatively called treasure i
would appreciate any feedback or thoughts you have on this poem. Later Kyle
Woodard


I am silent when others are loud,
I am humble when others are proud.
I sit in silence most of the time,
However I am no voiceless mime.

I talk in the silence when no one is there to listen,
I cry in the dark where no one can see my eyes glisten.
I listen to all who smile, cheer worry, cry and doubt,
I give wisdom and comfort to those who seek me out.

So who am I this selfless wonder?
So what am I some precious jewel or pirates plunder?
To what name do I give myself?
I am nothing more than an old dusty book on the shelf


-- 
Wallace Kyle Woodard IV
(512) 992-6346
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